J10.1

Day 4

By now my fever has gone and my temperature hovers at 37 degrees Celsius. I had almost forgotten what it felt like not waking up in a cold sweat.

I attempt to assist my daughter as she gets ready for Kindergarten. I have been avoiding her the last 3 days, in fear that i may pass on whatever virus i have. The last thing i need is to be sick AND have to take care of a sick child.

Lucky, in a sense, that my husband has also been down with the flu also and has been told to stay home. I'm not alone but we do keep our distance since his symptoms started a few days before. Paranoid we may cross contaminate, he sleeps on the sofa whilst i cough up my lungs on the high-bed in the bedroom.

I have to admit, i am lucky to be on the receiving end of the 5-star treatment, i'm talking about fresh lemon in my water bottle, hot tea and reminders when i should take my temperature and/or paracetamol.

I think he feels unappreciated.

Perhaps because when he started showing symptoms, i brushed it off as a case of "Man Flu". We joke around that he got the 1-star treatment.

I only got bumped up 1 star because i made him fresh soup.

As he rushed my daughter to Kindergarten, i got ready so we could be meet back at the doctors and be first in line at 8 o'clock.

But before the receptionist even sat down and started the day, there was already 5 patients waiting.

She greeted us and began by saying, it's only protocol that she asks if we were in Heinsberg or China in the last 2 weeks.

We said no.

She asked what were our symptoms  and asked if we had fever and our response was yes, 40 degrees.

At that exact moment, there was an undeniable pause before she continued.

Her eyes widened slightly.

She nodded and told us to come back at 10:45am.

...

So yeah after the check-up, the doctor tells me i have the Influenza. (J10.1 to be exact). Which translates to Influenza with other respiratory manifestations, influenza virus identified.

The doctor writes me a sick note and wishes me well.

And out of curiosity i ask whether or not i have to be tested for the Corona virus but was quickly shot down. Apparently, my husband and i are are not considered a risk and therefore were not thrown into isolation.

Although we both had the common symptoms:

• Sudden high fever
• Shortness of breath
• Breathing difficulties
• Cough

I reckon, they should make it mandatory that all that have the common symptoms to be tested.

But sadly, nobody wants to or have the capacity to test us. I live in Cologne, Germany.

So as the World Health Organization scrambles around trying to figure out what to do next and the rest figure out where they can buy their next stash of toilet rolls from, i'm going to take a nap.

I'm tired.

Influenza Journey

Today is Day 6 of my Influenza Journey and here is my attempt to recap the first few days.

It started on Friday morning with a slight uncomfortable scratching sensation in my throat. I figured it was the dry air in the apartment or simply dehydration. The heating in our apartment has been cranked up to "Tropics" mode, which is about 26 degrees Celsius. So when we step outside and it's like 5 degrees, it's a slap to the face each time.

I remember as i walked my 5 year old to Kindergarten, i felt every gust of wind rip through my numerous layers of clothing, thick scarf and jacket. Upon reaching home, i took my temperature and it was 37.7 degrees Celsius.

I had taken my temperature in my armpit, at which point, my better half told me it was better to place the thermometer under my tongue for a better reading. And yes, i did wash and sterilize it before i put it back in my mouth. And lo and behold, the temperature jumped up a whole degree and was actually 38.9 degrees Celsius.

No wonder i felt like crap.

I remember wrapping myself with my covers like a burrito and hoping my body would generate enough heat. But it was as if my matches were wet and i couldn't get the fire started. I was freezing.

By the evening, my temperature hovered around 39 degrees Celsius. And that's when the coughing started. It was a deep cough. Each time i coughed, it felt as if my lungs rattled. Like a mosh pit, i pictured both my lungs run into each other from either side of my body cavity at high speed. And bounce off one another.

Perhaps i was starting to become delusional.

I covered my head with my two duvets and it didn't take long for me fall asleep in my hole.

Day 2

It's 5:30 am and i measure my temperature. It says, 39.9 degrees Celsius. I write a message to my colleague to say, that i'm planned in to work at 11 am. I had already informed my boss the night before that i was sick and had a fever but was told that there are nobody to replace my shift. And he apologizes. So i reluctantly agree to come and do my shift. Despite feeling like a truck had just run me over.

My colleague sends me a simple Whatsapp response, "Ach du Scheiße". Which directly translates to, "Oh shit".

By 7:45 am, my temperature has reached it's all time high, 40.1 degrees Celsius. I debate with myself whether i should stay at home but start to panic because i had already told my boss, i would work. I can barely keep my eyes open, let alone comprehend the situation.

I start to cry.

I send him a message, along with a photo of my temperature reading.

No reply.

I eventually get a hold of my boss and speak to him directly. I tell him my situation and say i'm not fit to go to work.

He agrees.

And he doesn't sound pissed off. In fact, sounds totally OK with it all.

Paranoid that i was going to be fired, the feeling suddenly diminishes as i swallow an Ibruprofen and wait for it to do its' magic.

I lie back down and within seconds fall right back to sleep. I drift in and out of consciousness, by mid afternoon i am covered in sweat. At last, my fever has broke (one of many that day).

Day 3

Eventually, i peel myself off my high-bed and force myself to shower. As i stand there, i imagine the virus clinging to dear life to the soapsuds that washes passed my feet and as they scream for help, i watch motionless as they make an escape down the drain.

Oh, hello there.

I can't believe it's been 8 years since i checked in. I'm sorry for leaving you all in the dark. So much has happened, i don't even know where to begin.

Well all this time i had thought i had taken down this site.

I guess i didn't. Because all my shit thoughts are still here.

And looking at the "Blogs I Like" list on the right, shows that i'm not the only one that had better things to do than regurgitate their thoughts.

My sudden lack of interest and attention to detail when regurgitating my thoughts seemed to lack in my posts. In fact, i think i questioned whether or not it was worth all the time and effort. Paranoid perhaps people could read into my thoughts and judge me? Sharing too much information that perhaps i shouldn't be sharing. I have no idea.

But last night as i lay in bed with a 39 degree Celsius fever. I decided to log into my Twitter account (another platform where i have not visited in ages). My last tweet was in 2012 and that too was a half-arsed post.

Anyway, under the profile it stated this website.

I thought i'd click on it, even though i THOUGHT i deactivated it years ago. I figured i'd be faced with a blank page or an error symbol.

But i wasn't.

As i read through various posts, it brought me back to that day. Somewhat vague but good enough that i remember the situation.

And then it dawned on me.

What if i start writing again?

Not like i'm writing to anybody but because it's sometimes nice to know that someone is listening. Like as though i'm reading out loud.

Be right back.

I gotta attend to my laundry. It's been 3 days since i've had any energy to even get out of bed, there's an obvious indent on my mattress that i have barely moved. Plus i have to get ready for my doctor's appointment...