It's been about 10 days since i had my surgery and most of the serious pain has gone. I can pretty much walk around without hunching over or looking like i have a stick up my arse. I can even sit on the foot stool without yelling out that i may have pulled a muscle.
So far so good.
And since i'm new to this town and was not due to see my gynae for a check-up for another 9 months, i was in no desperate need to find an English-speaking one anytime soon.
But obviously, things change.
I, had previously googled for one but to find an English-speaking female gynaecologist seemed harder than it was. So when i told one of the doctor's at the hospital my dilemma, she was kind enough to recommend me one even though she said she wasn't technically allowed to. However, the gynae that she recommended just had a baby in December, so the doctor who notified me of the ectopic pregnancy and who also operated on me, will be her replacement when she's not around.
When she first examined me one of the questions she asked was why did i decide to move to this town. When she asked me whether it was because of my boyfriend, i said 'genau' which means 'exactly/correct' in German. And as if she empathised with me she said she understood because that's why she moved here too.
She speaks relatively good English, so i'm not stressing when she's explaining things. Plus she's very gentle and doesn't mind explaining things when i ask silly/obvious questions. She looks quite young [compared to my previous gynae's that i've had who were in their 50's].
So anyway yesterday i went for my first check-up since leaving the hospital last Wednesday. Everything is in order. My ovaries seem to be in perfect shape. And the healing process is going quite well. The incision on the left side is slightly bigger and has left a slight hole, probably from the tube that was hanging out there to drain the blood. It's not a gaping hole where my guts can fall out but it is an obvious indent.
But my doc reassured me that the skin should fuse together and not to worry. And as simple as '1, 2, 3' she slapped on some super sticky surgical strips and said that should be fine.
I also had to give blood... again.
I really don't like needles. My right arm has all these puncture wounds at the fold of my elbow, i almost look like i've been shooting up one too many times.
So anyway, my HCG levels [which stands for my pregnancy hormone levels] were still high on Friday when i went to the hospital and so they need to monitor it. It was somewhere in the 4,000 range and it should be down to zero. But apparently when i was first admitted to the hospital, my levels were somewhere in the 21,000 mark, so it's slowly making it's way down. Perfectly normal they say and should take a few weeks before it's back to it's original state.
Which could explain my sudden emotional bursts. One moment i'm fine and the next i'm crying.
J's been quite good in making sure my head is kept above water but sometimes when he goes on and on about how some people have it worse off, i can't seem to get a hold of my emotions and then i just break down again and then i'm fine. But then hours later i'm upset over something and thinking that he doesn't love me. And then i'm back to crying because i'm sorry.
It's I'm so annoying.
But the last couple of months have definitely put a helluva lot of stress on our relationship. In essence it was J with his work and me with trying to find my groove back in German. And then there was the every day frustrations, dealing with boredom and readjusting ourselves to a new environment. I think at one point, we may have lost our footing and our/my goal.
And like a true believer in fate, perhaps me going under the knife and removing the ectopic pregnancy was Life's cruel way of waking me up, forcing me to look at what i've become and in turn be more appreciative.
I don't know.
But what i do know is it wasn't meant to be and i have a whole new year ahead of me to make some kind of change.
...
And before i continue on riding on this emotional roller coaster, i'll add some photos from the weekend. The weather man predicted the snow blizzard known as Daisy would pass over most of Germany. And there was warnings not to go outside unless necessary. It even went as far as telling people to buy extra food, batteries and candles in case of a power shortage.
So there i was expecting some huge blinding blizzard to sweep through but where we live, it wasn't so bad. And although we had i reckon 20cm of snow fall and it was pretty damn windy outside, it wasn't as crazy as i thought it would be.
It's below freezing temperatures at the moment so the snow remains. And since Saturday the snow out in my neighbor's garden and our balcony hasn't seemed to have melted or gone anywhere. Everything looks so pretty when it's covered in white.
On Saturday J woke up early and surprised me by doing the dishes and making breakfast. The snow continued to whip across through the freezing wind whilst we stayed bundled up behind heated walls and channel surfed.
Then on Sunday when the blizzard left, we decided to take a walk around the neighborhood before it got dark. We had been cooped up indoors all weekend and J thought it would be a good idea to get some fresh air and some kind of exercise. So whilst he cleared the driveway and sprinkled extra salt on the ground so i wouldn't slip, i packed on the layers for our excursion around the block.
We ended up walking down one road that had hedges on either side of the road. The photo looks much scarier than it was. With no lights ahead and not a single sound, it was like a scene from a horror flick. But with so much snow on the ground it made the surrounding area much lighter than it was despite the sun having gone down already.The flash doesn't do the photo any justice.
We were surrounded by fields and random little streams. We tried to measure how deep the snow was and in some places it would come up to the top of my Timberland boots.
Standing by some stream and on the side of some field doing i'm-not-quite-sure.
Then as i was walking i stopped dead in my tracks. I noticed these foot prints on the floor. Like Nature's own graffiti, it littered the floor with random patterns.
I couldn't help but laugh when J showed me this pattern. It looked like he/she was confused and was running in circles.
Sometimes when i look at peoples' garden covered in snow, it reminds of that scene in Ghostbusters when that marshmallow guy explodes and the whole city is covered in white goo.
So far so good.
And since i'm new to this town and was not due to see my gynae for a check-up for another 9 months, i was in no desperate need to find an English-speaking one anytime soon.
But obviously, things change.
I, had previously googled for one but to find an English-speaking female gynaecologist seemed harder than it was. So when i told one of the doctor's at the hospital my dilemma, she was kind enough to recommend me one even though she said she wasn't technically allowed to. However, the gynae that she recommended just had a baby in December, so the doctor who notified me of the ectopic pregnancy and who also operated on me, will be her replacement when she's not around.
When she first examined me one of the questions she asked was why did i decide to move to this town. When she asked me whether it was because of my boyfriend, i said 'genau' which means 'exactly/correct' in German. And as if she empathised with me she said she understood because that's why she moved here too.
She speaks relatively good English, so i'm not stressing when she's explaining things. Plus she's very gentle and doesn't mind explaining things when i ask silly/obvious questions. She looks quite young [compared to my previous gynae's that i've had who were in their 50's].
So anyway yesterday i went for my first check-up since leaving the hospital last Wednesday. Everything is in order. My ovaries seem to be in perfect shape. And the healing process is going quite well. The incision on the left side is slightly bigger and has left a slight hole, probably from the tube that was hanging out there to drain the blood. It's not a gaping hole where my guts can fall out but it is an obvious indent.
But my doc reassured me that the skin should fuse together and not to worry. And as simple as '1, 2, 3' she slapped on some super sticky surgical strips and said that should be fine.
I also had to give blood... again.
I really don't like needles. My right arm has all these puncture wounds at the fold of my elbow, i almost look like i've been shooting up one too many times.
So anyway, my HCG levels [which stands for my pregnancy hormone levels] were still high on Friday when i went to the hospital and so they need to monitor it. It was somewhere in the 4,000 range and it should be down to zero. But apparently when i was first admitted to the hospital, my levels were somewhere in the 21,000 mark, so it's slowly making it's way down. Perfectly normal they say and should take a few weeks before it's back to it's original state.
Which could explain my sudden emotional bursts. One moment i'm fine and the next i'm crying.
J's been quite good in making sure my head is kept above water but sometimes when he goes on and on about how some people have it worse off, i can't seem to get a hold of my emotions and then i just break down again and then i'm fine. But then hours later i'm upset over something and thinking that he doesn't love me. And then i'm back to crying because i'm sorry.
But the last couple of months have definitely put a helluva lot of stress on our relationship. In essence it was J with his work and me with trying to find my groove back in German. And then there was the every day frustrations, dealing with boredom and readjusting ourselves to a new environment. I think at one point, we may have lost our footing and our/my goal.
And like a true believer in fate, perhaps me going under the knife and removing the ectopic pregnancy was Life's cruel way of waking me up, forcing me to look at what i've become and in turn be more appreciative.
I don't know.
But what i do know is it wasn't meant to be and i have a whole new year ahead of me to make some kind of change.
...
And before i continue on riding on this emotional roller coaster, i'll add some photos from the weekend. The weather man predicted the snow blizzard known as Daisy would pass over most of Germany. And there was warnings not to go outside unless necessary. It even went as far as telling people to buy extra food, batteries and candles in case of a power shortage.
So there i was expecting some huge blinding blizzard to sweep through but where we live, it wasn't so bad. And although we had i reckon 20cm of snow fall and it was pretty damn windy outside, it wasn't as crazy as i thought it would be.
It's below freezing temperatures at the moment so the snow remains. And since Saturday the snow out in my neighbor's garden and our balcony hasn't seemed to have melted or gone anywhere. Everything looks so pretty when it's covered in white.
On Saturday J woke up early and surprised me by doing the dishes and making breakfast. The snow continued to whip across through the freezing wind whilst we stayed bundled up behind heated walls and channel surfed.
Then on Sunday when the blizzard left, we decided to take a walk around the neighborhood before it got dark. We had been cooped up indoors all weekend and J thought it would be a good idea to get some fresh air and some kind of exercise. So whilst he cleared the driveway and sprinkled extra salt on the ground so i wouldn't slip, i packed on the layers for our excursion around the block.
We ended up walking down one road that had hedges on either side of the road. The photo looks much scarier than it was. With no lights ahead and not a single sound, it was like a scene from a horror flick. But with so much snow on the ground it made the surrounding area much lighter than it was despite the sun having gone down already.The flash doesn't do the photo any justice.
We were surrounded by fields and random little streams. We tried to measure how deep the snow was and in some places it would come up to the top of my Timberland boots.
Standing by some stream and on the side of some field doing i'm-not-quite-sure.
Then as i was walking i stopped dead in my tracks. I noticed these foot prints on the floor. Like Nature's own graffiti, it littered the floor with random patterns.
I couldn't help but laugh when J showed me this pattern. It looked like he/she was confused and was running in circles.
Sometimes when i look at peoples' garden covered in snow, it reminds of that scene in Ghostbusters when that marshmallow guy explodes and the whole city is covered in white goo.
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