Bass Agents are In Qontrol.

A huge congratulations to the Bass Agents
for managing to get themselves a slot in one of Amsterdam's top hardstyle events!

Supastaaaars!

That's right boys and girls, Bass Agents are definitely In Qontrol and will be playing for The Imperial Greenhouse Institute.

***

When: Saturday, 17 April 2010

Where: RAI [Amsterdam, The Netherlands]

Time: 21:30 - 07:00

How much?: € 47,- / VIP € 62,- [click to buy tickets]

***

Here's the 2010 line up as seen on Q-Dance;

The Third Millennium Society
Wildstylez (NL)
Technoboy (IT)
Fausto & Artento Divini (NL)
Coone & Isaac (BE/NL)
Frontliner (NL)
Stephanie (IT)
Dock 45 (NL)
Headhunterz (NL)
Noisecontrollers (NL)
Hosted by: DV8 (NL)

The Imperial Greenhouse Institute
Slim Shore (NL)
Dailucia (NL)
Psyko Punkz (NL)
Bass Agents (MALEISIE)
Alpha² (NL)
Deepack (NL)
Beat Providers LIVE (NL)
Titan (NL)
Crypsis (NL)
B-Front & Digital Punk (NL)
Hosted by: MC Villain (NL)

The Chaos Theory Foundation
Tha Playah (NL)
Mad Dog (IT)
E-Ruption (NL)
Partyraiser (NL)
Evil Activities LIVE (NL)
Nosferatu (NL)
Hellfish (UK)
D-Passion (NL)
Outblast (NL)
Korsakoff VS Day-Mar (NL)
Hosted by: MC Jeff (NL)

The Apocalypse Association
Norman (NL)
Waxweazle (NL)
Buzz Fuzz (NL)
Lady Dana (NL)
Stanton (NL)
Ghost (BE)
Dune (DE)
Panic (NL)
Franky Jones (BE)
MC Da Syndrome (NL)

***

I better crack the whip and sort out the cheapest way to get to Amsterdam from here. I need to find an accommodation for J and i to stay at in the city and one that won't burn a hole in my wallet. Fingers crossed that everything goes to plan and we actually make it there. I won't believe it until i'm standing amongst 30,000 people.

Please lord let me not lose my breath and pass out from exhaustion. I'm so excited, i think i'm gonna pee myself!

Sober Saturday.

It's Saturday night and i'm home alone with the kiddies because J's spending the night in Hannover.

:: Image courtesy of Movie Guide ::

J's best friend who lives in Hannover [about an hour and half drive from here] invited J over because he's having a bunch of his other friends over for some kind of "Boy's Night".

Huh? I have no idea.

Apparently the best friend's fiance is out for the night and so he's planned some kind of Street Fighter tournament. Each player puts in 5 Euros and the winner then takes it all.

I joked around and asked whether that was some kind of "secret code word" for strippers and mischief. But J assures me that they're only playing Street Fighter and most likely there will be a lot beer consumption.

I guess boys will be boys.

So last night J had this bright idea to rent the game and console last night from the Movie Rental place. It cost 8 Euros to rent the game and to borrow the console, one just puts in a 100 Euros deposit and when you return it, you get the money back. But it turned out that the CD couldn't be read. They only had one copy so J was utterly disappointed that he couldn't at least practice beforehand and get a few moves right.

And so he printed out a cheat sheet instead... tsk tsk tsk.

...

On Monday morning i have an appointment to bring the kitties to the vet for their 3rd vaccination shots and to get their ears checked. They have some funky looking dark crap in there that occasionally falls out in mini clumps. I suspect they have ear mites.

It's gross. Just thinking about it makes me itchy!

Originally i was going to go with J but the kitten foster couple called J earlier to ask whether i wanted to go along with them. They have an appointment too and they have to bring the other brother and another kitten for their shots. They offered to pick me up and drive me to the vet with them, which i thought was quite nice.

I think they just miss Luna and Yoshi and are making an excuse so they can just see them.


But little Luna is becoming more demanding day by day and is no longer the introverted feline that we once knew. Although she hasn't quite developed much of a voice, she has a habit of climbing to the highest vantage points and pats/claw my leg when she wants attention or if i'm taking too long to prepare their food.


They are currently taking turns lying on my lap and passing out. It won't be long until they get a surge of energy and start chasing each other around the apartment. And i just heard the front door slam which means our neighbor who lives below us has just left and is probably heading to some party or somewhere exciting.

As for me, well my night ain't looking too exciting, so i may just make it an early night.

Yes i know, i've become boring.

And this Winter fat that has mysteriously found its' way on to my body has made me so lazy and tired.

Say 'No' to Snappy Service and Zebra.

So last year i went all out and bought the original Adobe Creative Suite 4 Design Standard because i figured since i was registering my own design company and working on a big project, i would do "the right" thing and get the legit program. I swear, that was the most expensive purchase i've ever made, it hurt me to see that money disappear from my bank account.

Everything was going well until yesterday.

I don't know what happened but Illustrator decided to have a hissy fit when i tried to open a new document. The whole program would crash. And then as if i didn't know a window pops up to tell me that an unexpected error has occurred. So then i try opening my working document - the multiple artboards file that i'm working on for a logo i'm doing and the same bloody thing happens!

At this point i'm slightly panicking because i've agreed to do a huge project.

So then i spend a good 10 hours fiddling around with the settings, removing preferences, clearing the caches and removing random fonts i've recently added. I even tried creating a new user account and nothing seemed to work.

For some reason i'm convinced it's a font problem - i blame my free font rampage i had the other day.

And end up reading practically every post relating to why CS4 quits unexpectantly and possible solutions. I then download a free program for MAC OS X called FontNuke which removes font caches - which i think didn't really do anything. And a utility program called Cocktail 4.4 which is a generally for maintenance and optimization - and again, i have no idea if it actually improved the situation.

I refused to cry at this point.

Keeping my composure and restraining myself from throwing something at my MacBook, J then tells me to pack my computer and we head to the Mac store in the city centre.

The guy at the store wasn't really able to help me out but offers to check the hard drive and all that jazz for 60 Euros.

60 Euros is a bit steep for someone who's going to just end up doing the same things that i did. I'm not keen on the idea of leaving my baby with him for 4 days and on top of that, there's no guarantee that he'll even fix it.

So instead i buy 1GB of RAM for 25 Euros and hope that will help with the lag i've been having and crossed my fingers, hoping to find the source of the problem.

I go to bed with an even bigger headache. Why does CS4 hate me!?

...

Then this morning i decide to uninstall CS4 Illustrator [only after having deactivated it and clicking the box to erase the serial number]. And then after reinstalling it, the bloody thing crashes at start up!

I'm thinking, Oh shit. I broke it. Sticky fingers, now look what you've done!


I read there was a font called Zebra that was responsible for programs to crash and what do you know, i found that sneaky little bastard tucked away nicely in my Font Book. I immediately deactivated and removed it.

I then decide to deactivate all 500+ fonts and like magic...

ILLUSTRATOR WORKS!

I swear i heard the gates of heaven flung open and sweet angels playing their harps. So i decide to painstakingly go through my font book and manually add each font back and validate each one. A real pain in the arse but i know it has to be done. And any font that crashes the program, i then can blame.


Turns out there was a corrupted font. The bastard font that is responsible for my misery for the last 24 hours is a free font called Snappy Service. I can't even remember when i downloaded it.

Hours of my life that i'll never get back and are gone forever!

So word of advice for anyone using CS4, should you have issues with the program crashing on you, i suggest checking your fonts and seeing if any are corrupted.

Midnight Inspiration.

Last night i was looking for a particular clip art for J and happened to stumble upon the work of Steven Bonner. Distracted as usual, i found myself browsing through his recent work. I was impressed. I won't pretend like i know heaps about the Design world and neither will i regurgitate a history lesson about them.


When i do come across something that inspires me, i always wish that i too could be that creative.

I try to embed the still image in my brain. And even though i don't have a photographic memory it's times like these i wish i had - i should really start a Design scrap book or something and actually use it.


I reckon i am a visual person. One that understands more when i can see what i'm learning rather than just reading or hearing it. For example when i'm trying to remember a sentence structure in German, the highlighted multi-coloured words float off my page and stand motionless before my eyes.

And when it comes to Design, you just know when something stands out from the others. I definitely have a soft spot for vector art.


It's like i've been sucked into a black hole. And there i am wishing that my impatient lazy arse could mimic the techniques and be the lucky owner of such a creative eye.


So as i inch closer towards 30, i continue on my journey to find my groove and purpose in life. And in turn, never forgetting to envy those that i fancy.

Two Years Later...

It's Monday morning and normally by now i would be hitting the shower and getting ready to catch the 8:30am bus to my German class. But last Friday was our last day.

L to R: Mustapha, Evsi, Ludmilla, Aldona, Fatma, Alexander, Jade, Delman, Chiraz, Sona, Joanna, Gallini
+
a few others who are missing.

Instead of learning the usual grammar and doing past B1 German exam papers, we celebrated our last day by stuffing our faces with yummy food that everyone baked/cooked/bought and of course chatted in German with one another.

It feels kind of strange knowing that the course is done. Where has the past four weeks gone?

And although i am far from knowing everything that i need to know for the B1 level, i at least have a better understanding, or so i think. And out of the 3 practice tests that we did in class, i am proud to say that i got more than the minimum amount, meaning that i understand B1 German and i actually learned something, Danke schoen, Joanna!

I had the option whether or not i wanted to do the exam in March but i chose not to.

It costs a whopping 100 Euros just to do the exam and it doesn't guarantee that one will pass. But seeing that i don't really need the certificate as i already have a European passport and i'm not working somewhere that requires proof i know German, i decided to save my money.

But the next level up is B2 and that starts in a few months. I'm hoping to be more disciplined now and when i'm not working on my project, to actually go over my notes and study. Apparently, those doing the B2 course should already have a sound knowledge in the language and be quite fluent in speaking. Most importantly have a broad vocabulary - which i don't have at the moment.

But we're hoping that will change.

Yes, i am making more of an effort to try and speak German with J and vice versa. My sentences are still very basic like, What would you like to eat? or Do you know, what Time it is? Or repeating random phrases that i hear on TV and hoping that it sounds correct, or even asking J to translate something.

And as a result, i know J is proud of my effort. He often tells me how much i'm improving - a definite boost to my confidence.

I even try and speak to the kitties in German. Disciplining them with the word, "Nein" when they do something naughty or something they're not allowed to do. Or "Runter" [pronounced Ruhn-tuh] when they jump on a surface they're not allowed on. Or calling them "Kinder... Essen" [pronounced Kin-duh... Ess-sin] meaning Children... Food when i want to inform them it's their dinner time.

It's a slow process.

But i've noticed when i speak in English i frequently insert German words in my sentences. It comes almost naturally and much easier than trying to figure out what English word i actually wanted to use.

Did you know? Two years ago to this date [February 22nd] i packed a suitcase and got on a plane to this side of the world to see my sister. And in turn, turned over a new leaf.

Not knowing what the future had in store for J and i or whether or not i would even like it in Germany.

I took a chance.

And two years later, i can finally say, Oh mein Gott! Ich verstehe und spreche ein bisschen Deutsch. And actually mean it.

Hallo Luna. Hallo Yoshi.

So we finally picked up the kitty siblings on the eve of Chinese New Year which also happened to be the day before Valentine's Day. Great timing though since neither one of us prepared anything for V-day and so the kitties were our presents to each other.

"Suuupplieees!"

"Raaawr"

We decided to name the little black kitty, Luna because well, she's dark like a midnight sky except for a white coloured circle which looks like a moon at the front of her neck. Initially we wanted to call her Yoda like the super crusty old character in Star Wars because her ears are big in comparison to her head. But then figured what would happen if she transformed into a beautiful feline, then her name wouldn't do her any justice.

Then there's the boy, whom we named Yoshi, after the dinosaur character in Mario Brothers. Not because he looks like a dinosaur but because of his nature of being all over the place and a bit of a busy body. Plus both Jens and i liked the name.

As for the third kitten - which the foster couple named Max; Yoshi's brother/partner in crime, he remains with the foster couple and is waiting for a potential family to adopt him. We could only afford to take care of two, so we had to make up our minds and figure out what would be best for the kittens in the long run. We knew we wanted a boy and girl. And preferred one to be quieter than the other. We knew if we took the girl kitten, she would need a sibling to take care of her.


This photo was taken last Saturday at the foster couple's place. Luna weighed a mere 500 grams. She's so small, i reckon she could fit nicely in both my hands. She's slightly underweight and much smaller than her brother but apparently that's common for those kittens born last. We've switched them onto Royal Canin dry food and a wet food that claims to have at least 80% real meat inside. It's more expensive than say the typical Whiskas brand found in the supermarket which has barely any "real" meat mushed up inside. J insists they be fed good quality food.

Like most younger siblings, she follows whatever her older brother does; if he finds a gap and squeezes in, she'll follow soon after. If he jumps up on the shelf from the scratching post, she'll attempt the same thing later. Perhaps that's where they got that saying "don't be such a copy-cat".


She spends a lot of time observing what is going on and with her big eyes, she looks like she's trying to hypnotize you with her stare. She has a habit of climbing up on the back of chairs and balancing. Although she's more introverted than the brother and can barely meow. She does occasionally come to me when she wants attention and is generally becoming more active day by day. I'm guessing when she was in the foster family's home, there were so many cats around and that she was often bullied by the elders hence the reason for her shyness.


Yoshi, on the other hand, meows when he wants attention [which is usually when i'm at the computer]. And whenever i sit on the sofa he'll come and lie on my lap or in my arms. He's a very affectionate kitten and loves it when his stomach gets petted - a vulnerable area for cats and only accessible to those they trusts.


When J or i are at our computer, he'll find a way of climbing up and getting your attention. Whether it's climbing up your leg to sit on your lap or deliberately being in the way so you stop what you're doing and focus on him.


As you can see, Yoshi is a bit of an attention seeker but oh-so-lovable.


J had a soft spot for Luna from the minute he saw her. Whereas Yoshi and i connected very well from the start. It seemed destined from the very beginning. So after going to the Animal shelter a few times and looking at the other kittens then stating our case to the woman in charge, she finally agreed that we were fit enough to adopt the brother and sister.

The first couple of nights Yoshi would meow looking for his brother. And i couldn't help but feel sorry for him. But i think he's better now, he doesn't go wandering off meowing uncontrollably.


Both him and Luna are forever play fighting though and in between what looks like a nasty sibling argument, he'll take a break and lick her ear and clean her fur.


Both of them spend a good portion of the day sleeping. But when they're not, they're chasing each other around and pouncing on one another.


I've noticed Luna likes to provoke Yoshi by swishing her tail in front of him. She can be such a tease sometimes.


We've also recycled some cardboard boxes of which J cut holes in them so they can run through it. They love playing hide and seek in it. And our hallway is littered with empty toilet rolls of which Luna likes pushing around and pouncing on.


And i think Yoshi is developing a slight fetish for zippers. Because every time i'm sitting down and i have my hoodie on and he sees the little zipper thing, he gets all excited and wants to swipe it with his paw. Then he wants to roll himself all over me.

But i have to say, we're super happy that we made the right decision to adopt these two little fur babies because not only are they adorable and have the best temperaments but they keep me company when J's at work and when he disappears for several days for his training workshop.

Left, Right, Left, Right...

In attempt to save some of my pennies this past week, i decided not to take the bus back home after class. So instead of paying 2 Euros for each trip, which is equivalent to paying 10 Malaysian Ringget for a 10-minute bus ride, i chose to walk.

I've learnt not to convert the prices because it stresses me out knowing how expensive everything here is.

Anyway, even though it took me close to an hour each time, i have to admit though, i'm proud that i didn't cave in and take the bus. Yes, i know i bitched and moaned about how my back hurt each time i got home. And even though it was averaging about -4 degrees Celsius and my face was practically numb most of the way, i still soldiered on.

Damn those tiny snowflakes that kept blinding me!

And although i am far from having buns of steel or being fit, i can at least pretend that by the time Summer gets here, i will be just that little bit more healthier.

...

But on another note, J's been down with a bad case of the flu. Poor thing has been pretty much bedridden for the past two days. Rarely does he stay at home but this time it seems to have hit him hard.

Fingers crossed that i don't catch whatever he has. *PIEW PIEW to those germs*

Hopefully he'll be in tip top shape by next week cause he'll be away for a couple of days for another Training Workshop. Which also means when i get back from German class, i'm home alone with the babies!

Oh yes and...

tomorrow is the day that we get to finally take home our kitties! Just in time for Valentine's day and Chinese New Year. Photo updates will be added in days to come.

Courtesy of mer?

So for those of you who are celebrating the new year on the 14th, then "Gong Xi Fa Cai"! And for those of you who are love struck this Sunday, i remind you to Stay Safe. However, to those of you who would much rather give this Hallmark Holiday the finger, then cheers and Drive Safe!

Juggling ain't easy.

The doctor called me last week to tell me that i had to come in yesterday so they could do yet another blood test. My last test was taken on the 11th of January [9 days after my operation] and my results showed that my HCG levels [a hormone produced during pregnancy] was in the 500 range. Prior to the operation i measured over 21,000, so if you were to compare it, my last test results were not that high.

As a safety measure they have to continue taking my blood until the results reach zero. That way they are sure that there is no embryo tissue left in the body - sounds gross i know.

And if i don't hear from my doctor soon, i should assume my results are normal and i don't need to return until 3 months time when i have to do a full examination. But if she does call, well that just simply means i have to whip out my arm and they get to suck more of my blood out.

But overall, i'm doing well. In fact, i've been quite busy.

Last weekend J and i were invited to his colleagues' place for drinks.

The Chef + The Stylist + The Boss.

Him and his girlfriend organised a get-together with another couple for a night of home-made Mexican food, Beers, Margaritas, Mojitos and of course Gold Tequila matched with cinnamon dusted orange slices.

Tequila!

Good thing i had my camera cause after a few drinks, one too many shots and a round or two of Halli Gelli [a kid's game involving a bell and matching fruits that must add up to "five"] i can't really remember that much. It definitely was a case of blind drunkenness. The aim of the game was to get as many cards and to see how fast your reflexes were.

The Hostess

I have no idea what is going on at this point but it's obvious i'm still functioning. Alcohol makes people do strange things. And after a couple of drinks and countless shots, segments of my night have gone astray.

But going by the photos i took, everyone was smiling so i can only assume everyone got along. And i have to say, i had a good time although the hangover wasn't all that nice.

Anyway, i'm hoping by next week i can concentrate fully on work. Because for the past week i've been so preoccupied with doing homework and housework, that by the time that i want to sink my teeth into work, i can barely keep my eyes open.

I can't seem to juggle everything at the same time without getting extremely cranky. But i'm taking deep breaths and making sure my head stays above the water.


Oh and if i haven't mentioned it yet, i think the weather is absolutely nuts. It took a few days for all the snow to melt [again] and then yesterday the snow started up again! I'm looking outside and the streets are completely covered.

Today is supposed to be about -5 degrees Celsius which will mean any melted snow that tried to escape is now frozen and the ground is super icy - a bitch for cars without Winter wheels and those pedestrians with no grip to their shoes.

Hello Summer, where are you?

The countdown begins.

Stupid internal body clock woke me up this morning. On a week day i'm usually awake anywhere between 6 - 6:30am because J has to be at work by 7am and i make him a quick brekkie before he has to rush out the door. I have a habit of dilly dallying so i need at least an hour and half to get ready and time to dish out the food in Zynga's Café World - a daily habit that happens at least twice a day.

So anyway, i made it through another week of German class. I can't believe i only have two more weeks left till this course is over.

I still make many mistakes and am forever confusing myself with which tense i should speak or write in. Damn those masculine, feminine or neutral words! And whenever our teacher goes around the class to ask us what we did the day before or over the weekend, for some reason i can't seem to spontaneously structure my sentences correctly. But i'm not the only person, so i don't feel so dumb.

Then i'm taking a break to finish my project. Trying to simultaneously do both at the same time has proven to be super stressful and my brain can't seem to handle it. By the time i'm done with my homework and the housework, i'm so tired i can't seem to concentrate on work.

...

But i have good news, last Tuesday J called the Animal Shelter woman to state our case. We confirmed with her that we wanted the little girl kitty, Rosa and the striped boy, Moritz [as seen in the previous post. Both names are not fixed and will be changed]. Of course she tried to persuade us to take the third sibling but seriously, we can't afford three. Two as it is, is a handful. And if we need to send them to a Cattery, the costs would triple! It is understandable by adopting a second one, it eliminates various problems created by just a single cat but three would be too much.

And after several questions and answers, she eventually said we could have them.

When we told the foster mother we wanted to adopt the little girl, she was initially shocked. She had assumed we wanted the two boys. But i reckon, if nobody adopted the little girl, they would. They currently care for 8 cats but you could tell they were very attached to the little one.

All i can say is, tough titties to her because we want her! At the end of the day the decision lies in the Animal Shelter people.

And after a year of debating whether we should get pets and waiting for the right time, we finally made up our minds. And yesterday J and i went to the Animal Shelter to officially sign the papers for the kitties and get their Vaccination cards.


We payed up front and the price included the initial vaccinations and deworming tablets. As well as the compulsory micro-chipping or tattoo identification and castration/neuter. And because we adopted two at the same time, we got some kind of discount so it was 140€ - still super expensive when you convert and compare it to say, Malaysia. But i reckon the people here make every effort to make sure that there aren't so many unwanted births and adopted ones get proper care. I have yet to see a stray cat wandering the streets.

And apparently it's routine that every new owner gets a surprise check-up sometime after the animals go to a new home. It's the animal shelters' way to make sure that everything is in order and the animals are safe.

Which reminds me i need to seriously clean up the apartment and rearrange some furniture, isn't it Chinese New Year next week? I don't really celebrate but i will make an effort to organise and make sure everything is put away. I figured it can't hurt to bring in new Chi, luck and fortune our way.

So we're counting the days till next Friday, which is when we can pick the kitties up from the foster couple since they still need their last deworming pill before they go out to a new home. So in the mean time we're cat-proofing the apartment and buying the necessities.

I think we may even pop by the foster couple's place later so we can say "Hallo" to our babies.

It's all about Balance.

J and i have discussed it through and have decided we want babies. No, not the 2-legged kind - well not yet anyway but the 4-legged ones.

The animal shelter insists new cat owners adopt two cats - for the sake of the felines' sanity as well as the owners'. Which makes sense since we all know what can happen when a cat gets bored and goes a bit Satanic on their owner.

So we went to the animal shelter two weekends ago and saw one potential domestic 6-month old male kitten. There were dozens of kittens and cats there, so trying to narrow it down was hard. We then wanted to match him with a female one - not for breeding purposes but because we thought they might get along better.

The woman at the animal shelter said there was one female kitten that is being cared for by a foster family and perhaps we would like to see it the following week [last Friday] and so we did. But the kitty ended up being too shy and refused to even be in the same room as us, so that didn't really work for us.

But my story doesn't end there.

We then found out the foster family was also taking care of three 9-week old kittens from the same litter. Two boys and one girl. And when we went to their home we fell in love...

Top left: Max
Top Right: Moritz
Bottom: Rosa

I couldn't keep my eyes off Moritz. I think he's absolutely stunning and perfect. There definitely was a connection and his purrs kept getting louder each time i petted him. And that's when i knew, i had to have him.


J fell in love with the little girl kitten. She's so small she fits in the palms of both my hands! All black except for a small white dot just on her throat. She is slightly smaller than her two brothers because she was the last to be born and is much quieter than the others. She prefers to sit on your lap and craves warmth. She is an absolute darling and has the quietest little meow i've ever heard.

But when she's not sleeping, i think she's a bit of a daredevil. We heard her cries in the kitchen as we found her stranded on the top of the back support of a wooden chair. She had managed to climb up to the top not realising how high the chair was and later couldn't come down.


Max and Moritz are forever tumbling around and play fighting. I am sure that Max is the little trouble maker out of the two and we've even noticed that he bullies his little sister. But when one is awake, the other is soon to follow. And when it comes to sleep, they all seem to huddle together to keep warm. It is such a picture perfect moment.

But their names aren't fixed and neither one of us are too happy with "Moritz" and "Rosa", so we've made a short list of names. However, it's not confirmed yet whether we can adopt the brother and sister but we're hoping to find out this week. We may have to wait 2-4 weeks as they are not old enough yet to be given out and they still need to be microchipped and have their shots.

So we'll see, fingers crossed that everything works out.

...

Anyway, ever since J and i had that "big talk" two weeks ago and started Qigong, our lives have somewhat changed. Maybe it's a coincidence or maybe it was time for us to get off our lazy arses and do something with ourselves and with each other rather than hibernate and get on each others' nerves.

And as you know i've also taken on a new design project. It is to re-design an existing logo and create a comprehensive Corporate Identity manual. It ain't gonna be easy but at the end of the day it's work and we definitely need the money. I've already sent out my quote and i'm waiting for its' approval.

In the mean time i've been kept busy with learning German and going to class every day. It's starting to get more complex and trying to make sense of it all without doing my own head in has been tricky. Last week was so stressful, i could feel my stress building up and my voice rising. Waking up each day was just painful.

Speaking of pain, i am able to walk around pain-free! I can even lie on my side without grunting and i'm sure if i wanted to i could lie on my stomach without much trouble too. It's amazing to finally be able to do the simple movements that i once took for granted.

Of course the incisions they made have left their scars but i try not to look at them.

Mentally, i'm doing much better. I've stopped crying and i found it therapeutic to share my story with a few friends and my sister. Two people i know even shared with me their stories of miscarriage and abortion and although it's not quite the same, it's strangely soothing to know someone else has felt that kind of loss.

But to be honest, i haven't really had much time to think about anything now since my head is flooded with Deutsch.

Most of the time i'm switching my brain from absorbing German vocabulary and verbs to attempting to project some kind of creativity into my work. Definitely a case of Multi-tasking. I'm almost thankful the German course ends in February, so that gives me a few months to work in peace or shall i say with slightly less stress.

After which, i'm not sure what i plan to do but i trust that when it gets closer to that time i'll have something figured out by then. So for now, i'm looking forward to the day my Quotation gets approved and when the woman at the animal shelter says we can finally bring home our two kitties.