I Bit Off More Than I Could Chew.

Today i officially quit one of my jobs.

Yes and i meant it in a plural sense. It probably doesn't make any sense to you all but a lot has been going on in my life in the last 9 months or so. No, i'm not pregnant.

Not only did i stop blogging [yeah, sorry about that!] but i even stopped stalking reading other blogs. I detached myself from the internet world and concentrated on... well, me.

Let's rewind a little…

I'm sure some of you have experienced it but living life without some kind of regular income is very hard.

But in 2009 i chose to be an independent graphic designer because i had a client who needed some work done and in order for it all to be legal - tax wise, i would need to register for a company… so i did.

It's been close to three years and the projects are finally coming to an end but unfortunately my daily bills aren't.

Speaking of bills, i just received a letter from the tax office saying that i owe them over 1,500 Euro in tax for my earnings i made in 2010.
.
.
.

*gulps*

Anyway moving on, i was and in some way, still am, at a cross point in my life.

To be honest, deciding whether or not to jump back into the world of Design after having a burnout still scares me.

However, on a positive note, my German is slowly getting better and am actually able to speak in coherent sentences. But if i had to explain a design concept in German in a Work In Progress meeting, i may be in trouble. Hence, the reason why i needed to throw myself into any kind of job that didn't involve much speaking but one that i could improve with along the way.

But as a RMIT University graduate that also did a year in Honours, i found it hard to even get part-time work at a Bakery. It was my lack in experience not my credentials that was the problem.

That was until August 2011 came around and there was an opening at J's work place - he works in Gastronomy & Events by the way and is one of the bosses there.

It wasn't anything glamorous but money is money.

The position was for two and a half hours, five days a week and i was to help out in the kitchen, help set up and serve hot food in the restaurant. I sweated bucket loads because i had to wear long sleeves under my short-sleeved uniform to cover my tattoos but i didn't mind that much.

I worked my butt off and it eventually payed off because they offered me more hours when a colleague applied for sick leave and they needed a replacement.

However, the woman ended up coming back and as a result, i lost my extra hours and was back to two and a half.

***

Then i remember when January rolled in, J and i went to eat at a salad bar. I ordered a veggie panini and couldn't believe how good it tasted. As i studied the girls behind the counter, i thought, their job can't be too hard - i can do that! We got home and visited their website and it turned out they were looking for employees.

So J helped me fill in my application and we hoped for the best.

The interview went well and i realised those few months that i was working at my other job gave me enough confidence to communicate in German. And that very day, the boss said OK and i could even start the next week.

I was over the moon!

A second job = yay, even more money.

***

Then in March, J told me his workplace was cutting costs and there was one too many employees in the area i was working at. Which would mean between my colleague and i, one of us would have to be fired.

But then i was offered a position as a Barista [a fancy word for someone that serves coffee] at the Lavazza Coffee bar.

So i took it and my colleague was able to keep her job.

On the 9th i was informed i was being transferred and by the following Monday the 12th, i was standing by the fancy coffee machines already instructed to make a range of coffees, foam milk, work the cash register and lay the correct spoon/plate for each coffee during the peak hour lunch break.

It'd like to think i'm a rather fast learner but in this case, i wasn't fast enough.

It is understood that newbies make mistakes but my inability to remember more than three orders consistently, let alone having to register more than 3 customers at one time was against me.

And it didn't help hearing snide remarks each time i took my time pouring the milk into my cafe latte, forgot/made a wrong order, didn't put enough foam in my latte macchiato or how i dared to serve a customer a cappuccino with foam that didn't look "good".

In my head, i kept yelling, BITCH... CALM DOWN!!!

Alas, the stressful environment and having to work sometimes till 10:30pm at my other work place had affected my concentration and in turn, increased my chances of spilling/messing up my orders.

So after my shift yesterday i went directly into the office, in fear that a bitch fight would unravel, only to find J sitting there alone. And i immediately said, i wanted to quit.

We had talked about it the night before, right after my six and half hour shift at the salad bar and we both agreed, super fast coffee making was not my forte.

No matter what you say, kerning IS important.

And because of the number of off days i still have left from last year, i was able to hand in my resignation this morning and leave immediately. Yes, i wrote the letter in German [with a little help from J of course].

On my way to work, the church by the bus stop.

If it wasn't for the fact that the salad bar offered me more hours and that my other colleagues are HEAPS nicer, i probably wouldn't have done it.

But i did.

And after shedding some frustrated tears, i am glad that i had the balls the courage to follow through.

...

So yeah, that's pretty much it.

Now that i have a little more time on my hands, i remembered the laundry needs to be attended to and the apartment needs a good spring cleaning.

I Told You So + Sitting Face to Face

If your car gets towed and impounded in Cologne, it costs 197€ to get your car back. I know this because when J woke up this morning, he looked out the window to find that his car was missing.

The first week we moved here he got a ticket for parking at that very spot. And despite reminding him numerous times he shouldn't park there in case the parking inspectors come, he reassured me that they don't check so early in the morning.

On a typical week day, J would leave for work before 7 o'clock but since his boss said that he could come to work late because he's working late tonight, he slept in until 9.

Parking Fine #1

There aren't any signs that says one cannot park there. So, the second time J parked there, he figured that if he parked partially on the sidewalk, it wouldn't obstruct the traffic. In fact, there was ample room for any vehicle to pass.

Parking Fine #2 + Prison for Cars

I guess he was wrong.

Oh well, i guess that shows him, that maybe next time he should listen to his woman!

***

So anyway, yesterday i experienced my first Tandem Language Learning experience. I later learnt that the Russian Blond Chick i was supposed to have a date with, was not from Russia but from Kazakhstan.

When she told me where she was from, it reminded me of that time i was on the monorail back in Malaysia and a guy [who i first thought was from Kazakhstan but ended up being from Kyrgyzstan] passed me his number on a piece of paper as he was exiting the train. You can read all about the days leading up to my "first date" here and here.

And after finally gathering enough guts to contact this stranger, we eventually arranged to have a date several days later but then the dickhead stood me up. Read about what i ended up doing instead here.

ANYWAY, back to my date with the thirty year old Kazakhstanian Blond Chick...

We planned to meet outside a particular bookstore in the city and later have some coffee nearby.


I chose to take the earlier train because i wanted to have a look around the city. It was my first time out on my own, so i wanted to make sure i knew where i was going. And in case i got lost, i would have enough time to find my way back.

2.50€ to travel 9 stops in 18 minutes

But i found my way and had about an hour to spare.

When it got closer to the time, i realised trying to find a complete stranger in a sea of people based on a passport-sized image of only her side profile can be a bit challenging.

But there she was standing by the doorway and not that much taller than me. Somewhat attractive with a shoulder length blond hair, wearing skinny jeans, brown high-heel boots and a matching leather handbag. She definitely looked quite posh.

So the plan was, i was supposed to speak in German and she was supposed to correct me when i made mistakes and vice versa except she would speak English. And although i made far more mistakes and probably ended up speaking a lot more than her, the pressure to make sure my sentences were grammatically correct was on full force.

I almost felt like i was back in school.

So when i explained to her in simple German sentences that i speak English with J and only recently have we started to try speaking German together, she immediately said that it was a pity that my boyfriend didn't speak German with me.

I could almost see the look of disapproval oozing out of her round face.

I immediately became defensive and protective of J and told her in English that it was my fault because i told him not to speak German with me. And that during my early days of learning German, we would often argue because i was annoyed because i didn't understand. But now that i'm slightly more confident and ready, we're trying simple sentences.

So the interrogation continued and just like any other date, we tried to tell one another the more interesting facts about ourselves.

An hour and half later, we ended our session [minus the coffee because we forgot to order some] and to tell you the truth, i was relieved that it was over.

My first impression? She's a wee bit too serious for my liking. Maybe next time i should ask her what her star sign is, so i can see if, astrologically, we get along.


But i think i made a good impression because she wants to meet up again this coming Monday.

I almost feel like i need to study more, in fear that she'll one day whip out a wooden ruler and beat me with it if i repeat the same mistakes for the umpteenth time.

I told her i would write her a message later to confirm.

Maybe if i agree to meet up again, i can suggest going for an ice-cream or maybe drinking a cocktail. There's nothing like a bit of alcohol to make conversations flow better and chill people out.

***

Before i forget...

I apologise for missing half of my nose and looking practically white in this photo. I'm seated directly in front of the window and the blinds were open.

P.S. I'm not that pasty in real life.

Day 2

But this is my new hairdo with a purple tinge to it. I know it's red in this photo but just imagine it to be more purple.

My hair is usually really straight but because i just let my hair down minutes before i took this photo, it looks like my hair is full of volume. I actually quite like it this way but i've got stubborn hair, it refuses to stay curly.

So after growing my hair for over two years and having it hang down to my hips for the last year, i decided to chop off about 6 inches at one go.

Why? Why not.

I figured it won't be another four months or so until i visit the hairdressers again, so i'm sure it'll grow. Plus i wanted to make the visit worth the time and the money.

If only Moving was as simple as an IKEA Instruction Manual.

I can't believe it's been twelve days already since my last post. So much to share, so much to grumble about. Where, oh where, do i begin?

But when i wasn't wrapping random items in old newspapers and labeling boxes, i did manage to sneak in a few photos along the way. I haven't gotten around to editing them yet cause i've only just hooked up my computer and managed to get online this morning.

But here's a somewhat brief update of the last twelve days...

It was everything but relaxing.

The move itself went relatively smooth and thanks to the two big Russian men, J's brothers and elder brother's girlfriend for helping bringing the boxes down to the truck, it only took two hours to basically fill a 6.6 tonne truck right to the brim.

Yup.

We have that much stuff. And that doesn't include all the stuff that is still left in the cellar.

But since we had to give three months notice and our landlord couldn't find somebody to move in before the end of January we still have to pay another months' rent. Which sort of works out seeing that we still need to repair/paint part of the wall and clear out whatever stuff we have left.

Sigh.

But unlike our previous cellar which was tiled, clean and big enough to put a queen size bed plus more, the cellar we have now is quite the opposite. I'm just grateful that we've moved into a much bigger apartment.

Anyway, my biggest headache so far has had to be our IKEA kitchen.

We payed extra for IKEA to gather the components to our kitchen and when we got home we found out that some of the items were either missing or completely wrong. But perhaps it was a blessing in disguise because due to some minor miscalculations and crooked pipes, we had to make some last minute adjustments anyway.

After driving to IKEA twice because they promised to deliver the missing items the next day but didn't. They then said we had to wait a week until they could deliver the missing items and pick up the extra pieces because their schedule was full. Annoyed and frustrated because half of our kitchen was missing, J then threatened to return the whole kitchen and insisted that we get our money back.

At which point, the woman went to go speak to her boss and within a few minutes came back and said, they would deliver the pieces the next day already built at 8 in the morning.

Hmmm.

Proof that a little pressure didn't hurt no one.

So anyway, as part of The Moving deal, the big Russian men that helped with our move, also said they would set up our kitchen and do the necessary drilling. Half way through unpacking the items, they tell us that it was the first time they had ever built a kitchen from scratch.

Apparently, there are other kitchen brands that come partially built. One just has to slot the corpuses together and drill the holes for the sink and stove top to fit.

Uhhhh. OK.

We just invested just over a thousand Euros for the kitchen cabinets and knowing that they haven't put together kitchen cabinets before, only stressed me out further.

But after many hours, a few shed tears and some shuteye, they finally finished the job

Never mind that we ended up having to pay them an extra 300 Euros to drive an hour and a half last weekend to finish the job.

I guess it's safe to say, that will be the last time i will ever build an IKEA kitchen.

***

Anyway, as i get distracted by all the different sounds that the city has to offer and stare up at the five-storey block of apartments blocking my view, i look around me wishing the boxes that have yet to be unpacked would just magically disappear. If only there was a genie who would put away all its contents so i could get on with my errands.

Oh right! I am that genie.

But first, i need to get my arse to the hardware store which so happens to be like, twenty minutes away by foot and return some metre long blinds and various items that don't fit. Seriously, i don't know what i was measuring because i was, like, off by 20 cm.

All in all, i love being back in a big city. Everything is reachable within walking distance and shops are literally around the corner.

Great for exercise, not so great for my bank balance.

I'll be back soonish.

Hopefully with some photos.

Things To do Today.

It's 6:45 AM and i've already got a long list of Things To Do Today. Not only do i have to finish my work so i can email my copywriter the finish pieces to be proofread but i still have stuff to sort out at home.

Majority of it involves cleaning; taking out the garbage, replacing the kitty litter, mopping the floors, wiping down the windows and vacuuming the carpets... again. Damn cat hair!

Plus i have a whole load of crap that's waiting to be stored in the cellar. And why do we have, like, a dozen pair of shoes sitting in our hallway taking up all the space?

Clutter... clutter... clutter.


And somewhere in between all of that frenzy i need to get my arse to the post office to mail Mimi's birthday present. I'm hoping if i send it by today, it'll arrive at my sisters' place tomorrow.

Why do i have a habit of leaving things until the last minute?


My worry is with the amount of snow that is still outside and the potential snow showers later. Although i don't mind the 4 km bike ride - i need the exercise anyway but it's the melting snow that i'm more concerned about. My tyres are not equipped for such slippy conditions plus i don't own a helmut.

But if i decide to take the bus it will be faster but it'll take longer for me to get home. It only drives by this way every two hours and it'll cost me 4 Euros. Obviously, Time is of essence and 4 Euros is a lot of money. So with the first bus leaving at 8:40 AM, i gotta make up my mind quick!

All i know is at 5 PM our landlord is coming with some potential tenants to view our apartment. It'll be the first time he will have seen the place since we moved in fourteen months ago and the first time to officially meet Luna and Yoshi.

*Hopes to all living creatures that the kitties don't freak out and run out the front door*

So it's vital that we make a good impression especially since we're moving out in a few weeks and we need our security deposit back.

OK enough dilly-dallying, i need to get back to scrubbing.

Not My Typical Tuesday.

My regular mornings are rather quiet the minute J steps out the front door to get to work. I sip my freshly brewed coffee, check my emails and think about which thoughts i want to regurgitate before i start real work.

But after hitting the snooze button on my handphone one too many times this morning and attempting to push J out of bed one handedly, Luna and Yoshi, as usual, heard this commotion and began scratching at our door to get our attention.

My irritation grew each time the alarm went off because J refused to wake up.

He finally tells me TWO hours later that he has the day off. In fact, he has the next two days off.

Great.

So after mumbling to him he could have at least told me or reminded me beforehand, i turned over in a huff. Waking up before the crack of dawn sucks big time and had it not been for the rude interruptions, i could have at least snuck in another hours' worth of sound sleep.

But noooOooo...

I woke up on the cranky side of bed with a headache as result of not drinking enough water and the heater being turned on full blast all night.

So much noise.

So much action first thing in the morning is not good for any headache.

Luna got on my nerves by repeatedly showing off that she could jump onto the kitchen counter and lick the margarine off the knife. And Yoshi was obsessing with sticking his nose in things he's not allowed to.

So far, my morning has been everything but peaceful.

But like a hurricane appearing out of nowhere and then disappearing, the apartment is back to its' quiet self.

Phewww.

Luna is observing the morning birds stretched out on the window sill. Yoshi has parked himself in the space between me and the keyboard and is passing out as i type this. As for J, he's back in bed catching up on lost sleep.

And me?

My plan is to gather information on the real estate lady from our apartment that we apparently have.

Why?

Because after close examination, the company that she says she's with doesn't match up with the one that was featured online. And just to be sure, we're contacting the company to see if she actually works with them. There's a lot of money at stake and i don't want to be the loser sending money to some fraud.

Yesterday, i was 99.9% sure the apartment was ours but now i'm not so sure.

But until i'm standing at the front door with the signed contract in my hand and the keys to the new apartment in the other, i just don't believe this is all happening.

4 weeks and counting.

But before that all happens, i've got to complete three property brochures and a few logos by Thursday.

Yup, the pressure is so ON!

***

UPDATE: The real estate lady is legit and according to the other company they outsource other real estate agents to work with them. So yea, just thought i'd mention again, J and i have a new home to move into in three weeks and six days.

Yay!!!

Shrinking Cysts + Home Hunting Continues.

I'm slowly getting the hang of cycling in 5˚Celsius temperatures. The extra layers and knitted band that helps keep my ears from falling off really does make a huge difference.

So after getting only slightly lost earlier today, i made it to my gynae's office with a few minutes to spare.

Turns out all's good "down under". The massive cyst on my right ovary that i complained about here has reduced down to 2.6 cm in diameter. And it turns out my left ovary felt left out in the process and has developed a 3 cm cyst.

Great.

She explained to me that women who are prone to cysts are recommended to start birth control pills to reduce cysts - which i so happened to be on for the last three years. She then went on to say, there are some women [me for example] that will continuously have cysts due to genetics even if i take the Pill. It's some kind of hereditary weakness.

Yay. Lucky me!

But she says that i shouldn't worry, as it has no direct effect to my reproductive system should i one day choose to be preggers. However, as a precaution i should get examined every six months or so.

The joys of being a woman.

***

Moving on...

Ya know how we were supposed to drive to Cologne on Saturday to view that awesome apartment that J and i were really interested in?

WELL IT AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN!

The landlord emailed me just now to inform us that our appointment is cancelled because somebody has decided they like the apartment much more than us. In other words, the place is taken.

DAMN IT!

There i was imagining our furniture and rearranging my work room in my head. I was even getting all excited about walking that 10 minutes to my pole dance class.

I can't help but think that some bitch took MY place!

YES, my place.

Trying to find an apartment can be so stressful. It definitely brings out the competitive side out of me. Who would have thought so many people would consider moving at this time of the year. Weeks before Christmas, days before it starts dumping snow.

I guess i have to get over the disappointment quick and just continue the hunt.

And to make myself feel just that little bit better, i'm just going to tell myself, if the place was meant to be, then it would have been ours by now.

Sending out good vibes that i find an affordable and even better replacement. One that is even more centrally located with enough parking and a supermarket down the road would be great too.

Seven more weeks and counting...

***

Have you seen What Happens in Vegas? In Germany, they've changed the title to, Love Vegas.

Huh?

I guess when one translates titles from English to German, it doesn't quite have the same effect.

I know this movie is like so two years ago but i thought i'd mention it since J went out of his way to borrow DVDs yesterday. Plus i actually found this movie really funny.

The other movie he chose was Shutter Island but because he knows i get scared at even the smallest things, he matched it with this Chick flick in attempts to soothe any nightmares.

Awww... there's love.

There's a Thin Line Between Obsession and Addiction.

Earlier today i was running around town buying some International calling cards, topping up his finished toiletries and picking up his hoodie he needed fixing at the seamstress. J had to rush out and get his hair cut before his interview tomorrow, transfer child support money before the post office closed and pick up a 12 kg kitty litter bag all in a span of two hours so he could get back to work to finish whatever he had to do.

So we met up briefly in the city so i could pass him some money since he forgot his ATM card.

But just when i thought things were going smoothly, i went and ruined it by confronting him by telling him that he has a, dare i even say it, gaming addiction.

Fuck. Me and my stupid mouth.

What i probably should have said was i think he's got an obsession.

Of course he was quick to defend himself and said that it's not an addiction but a "hobby". And that basically i don't understand that now he has "friends" and that i'm asking too much from him. But i thought hobbies are recreational activites done once, maybe twice a week. Not one that is done nearly every day for a duration of 4-7 hours.

Yes but does his friends cook for him, tidy after him, do his laundry, iron his shirts or do they even care that his girlfriend may end up losing patches of hair due to this unnecessary stress?

And so we ended up in yet another stupid argument, standing in an empty parking lot near the sidewalk. And in the heat of the moment turned around and just got on my bike and left. J sped into the other direction and my guess was to head back to the office. That was at 6:30PM.

Then four hours later i received a sms telling me that he's going to go have a beer after he's done with work.

In the whole time that i've been living with him, he's never called to say he needs to go out and have a beer. If anything, he would call to ask if i would like to meet up with him and we both have a beer together.

And so i replied with, You do that. Viel Spaß! [Have fun! in german]

It's 12:45 AM and he's still not back and none of his bags are packed.

And without sounding "needy" or "controlling", i will refrain from sending him a sms or even calling to find out when he'll be home.

But i didn't think i pissed him off that much that he'd rather not want to come home, let alone be with me.

Either he's really pissed off that i've accused him of having an addiction. Or that he feels whatever he does i don't seem to be happy and that all i do is complain about his gaming. Or maybe he just wants a break from everything, me included.

Our train to Hamburg departs at 9:05 AM and nothing has been packed.

I'm starting to wonder whether i should even bother accompanying him at all.

***

Last week he admitted that him playing is an escape from reality. It's his way of "switching off".

His argument will always be that he spends at least 10 hours a day at work and deep down he's resentful that i get to work from home. And all he wants to do when he's at home is to unwind because he's tired.

On one hand he says he'd go for bike rides and places with me but if says he's tired then what's the point of going out if he's going to pull a long face?

Because god forbid that by spending more than my fair share of time with him means it'll eat into his valuable time that he could be playing another round of Battle-Fucking-Ships.

But me whining that he doesn't spend time with me is not entirely true.

He does.

The only difference is now any time spent feels like it's always put on a timer. Once my few hours are up and we've made our way back home, it's guaranteed that he'll eventually log in & play, check his stats and/or check in on his clans' forum.

He says, if there were more interesting things to do in this town then he wouldn't play as much.

Riiiiiight.

So, what happens in December when we do move to a new and exciting city? My question to him is will he keep his end of the bargain and be more active, be adventurous and spend quality time with me outside?

I really doubt it.

Yea, more like stay at home so he can chat with his "friends" on team speak and be all clever with his strategies.

I bet i'll be hearing the typical excuses such as, "it's too cold" or "it's snowing. Maybe it's best we stay at home".

***

I'm starting to really believe it's much easier to keep your hopes high and to keep your expectations low to avoid disappointment.

I try to be supportive.

I truly am trying my best since i know how much he hates his job. So he shares with me stories about work and how frustrated he is with it but then not long after gets online and i hear him laughing with his online friends.

Hang on. Why do they get all the laughter and smiles?

It's slowly getting to the point that i can't wait to leave this godforsaken town, in hopes that he'll find peace within himself. And that maybe, i can meet people… real friends that actually look forward to wanting to spend time with me.

Then maybe, then he'll realise i'm not always available at his convenience and dinner will not always be ready on the table.

***

I'm highly considering getting a part-time job on top of running my own business. I just need to know which city i'm heading to next year so i can actively start searching. I need to be selfish so i can have a life. One that doesn't necessarily depend on him as much.

Why does it feel like i've just become a burden?

***

So i've turned to google for advice and have been reading various forums describing in detail what couples have to deal with because of their partners' gaming habits.

One woman calls herself a Widow of a World of Warcraft gamer. She went as far as having a day-time boyfriend whilst her husband stayed at home any chance he got just to play. And apparently her day-time boyfriend and her didn't have sex but they did do the typical couple thing by going to the movies, lunches and so on and so forth. That eventually woke her husband up and he realised he was losing his wife.

I'd like to think we would never get to that stage of our relationship but hey, never say never.

Another woman even needed therapy. The advice given was to live her life as if she were single, and never plan on him doing anything with her or for her.

I could possibly do that, in fact i have made an effort since i've gotten back from my solo weekend getaway to run errands on my own. I even rode my bicycle and did the weekly shopping on my own which previously he and i would do together.

But one piece of advice that seems to be repeated is, "Finally, you should never confront your addicted gamer in a threatening, angry, or violent way. This only confirms their suspicions that you're only trying to sabotage their happiness." [source]

***

Then i stumbled across this wonderful forum called, On-line Gaming Anonymous.

Where members basically share their stories of how gaming has affected their relationships. "It's a self-help fellowship. They share their experience, strengths and hope to assist in recovery from the problems caused by excessive game playing, whether it be computer, video, console, or on-line. "

Stories such as this and this sound familiar to what i'm currently going through. So reading these stories, have made me feel just that little bit better and makes me feel not so alone.

The difference is J he's been playing his game on and off for the last 13 or so years. And only three months ago he was invited into a clan where he now has regular friends he can meet up and play with.

For all i know, he's met some female clan member that he clicks with [no pun intended].

***

But if it weren't for the fact that i want to see Hamburg cause i need to know whether or not i'd want to live there. And that i have already booked the double room and prepaid for the train tickets using my identification card. I have no choice but spend the weekend with someone whom i might just end up arguing with over the same shit over and over.

Oh joy.

I can't wait.

***

12:57 AM and he just walked in and has made himself comfortable in the bathroom. I think he's even making phone calls. By the looks of it he's either drunk or he's giving me the silent treatment.

Another Day, Another Phase + Tortilla Pizzas

Yesterday was a relatively productive day. Not only did i manage to regurgitate my thoughts and vent out Tuesdays' frustrations but i actually got some work done.


Trusting the good ol' fashion Pencil & Paper approach to sketch out my brochure layout makes it feel like i'm actually progressing in my new project.

Often i'd skipped that crucial stage and go straight to the computer to try and work it out there. Again, that's my impatience working at its' best. Although i'm not sure if that's actually the smartest way to work since i end up spending more time tweaking colour boxes and adjusting and then readjusting text areas to find a balance.

So anyway, by the time J came home which i think was around 5 PM, i was busy scribbling away and getting lead dust all over the sleeve of my white hoodie. He went to take a nap and i didn't see him emerge from the bedroom until an hour later just in time for me to start making some dinner.

And so i made tortilla pizzas out of what feels like that never-ending pack that J bought last week.

Believe it or not we even sat down together to have dinner minus the computer being switched on and watched Das perfekte Dinner. Yup! I got 30 minutes of his undivided attention, of which i think i even saw him smile.

***

But this is what we ate. I love how versatile it was and how you can pretty much put whatever you want on it. Maybe it's true when they say, the way to a Mans' heart is through his stomach. Feeding me with compliments made me feel like i did something right.

Thank you tortilla pizzas, you saved our relationship.

So simple but so tasty!

Heat up the oven to 200˚C and smear on a thin layer of the wet ingredients on a plain tortilla. Sprinkle whatever toppings you like and sit it on a baking tray at the highest section for about 5 minutes or until the edges crisp up.

+ Tomato concentrate
+ Tomato based pizza sauce
+ Ketchup
+ Cracked Pepper
+ Garlic Powder
+ Dry Oregano
+ Grated Cheese [e.g. Gouda]
+ Green Peppers

***

Everything was going great until he removed himself from the sofa and made his way to his computer. Seeing him reach for his headset immediately put me in a foul mood and at that point i knew i had lost him. There's no sense trying to talk to a man who can't seem to multitask when it's game time.

So i went to my work room, which is right next door to the living room and spent the rest of my energy searching for images for my project. Blasting my music so i didn't have to hear him talk loudly to his clan members was the only thing that kept me calm.

And so i kept my mouth shut and chose to ignore him.

Seriously, if he wants to crawl into bed past midnight because he spends all evening gaming, then wake up six hours later grumpy because he has to be at work at 7 AM, then that's his fucking problem. I've had enough of telling him that he actually does need sleep in order to function.

But it wasn't always like this.

Yesterday afternoon the sentimental part of me got distracted by kept e-mails. J and i used to write to one another constantly back when we were in a long distance relationship. The folder states there are a total of 495 emails dating from 1.10.2007 - 25.10.2008. Many of which include words of passion and the utmost desire to be together. As i'm sure every new formed couple will know what that's like.

Three years later the exchange of kind words have become a rarity and avoiding each other has become a normality.

Do i blame stress? Maybe.

But is this what i have to look forward to for the rest of our relationship? I so hope not.

I wake up to a gloomy Thursday with not even a spoken exchange of a "good morning" and an extended hug goodbye. Instead i get a halfhearted "Tschüss Christina" and watched him shut the front door behind him in a hurry because he was late for work.

An Ultimatum + Viva Colonia

It is inevitable that once a couple gets past the honeymoon stage of a relationship and the butterflies have disappeared, that there will be confrontations. Some bigger than others. Some more petty and worth laughing about. But at the end of the day what is important is that both parties don't give up on each other and trying to build on the relationship.

Building a strong foundation together is what keeps the relationship from crashing but it only takes one to turn around and ruin it.

So the issue with the cigarette smoke and Js excessive game playing was just the icing on the cake.

I'd like to say the last year for us has been a smooth one but with external stresses it's made it rather difficult. More so for J, which in turn has effected how he has been in the relationship. Lately, our catty remarks and impatience with one another has become more of an annoyance than something to shrug off as a quirky character.

But combine Js dissatisfaction with his job, no respect from his colleagues and the inability to properly rest, means when he gets home the last thing he needs is a nagging girlfriend bitching about her issues and wanting to spend time with him.

Our lifestyles couldn't be any different.

So after several hours of me yelling/talking/crying it out and J jotting down the Positives & Conflicts in our relationship, we came to the conclusion that something needs to be done to improve our situation.

We both are willing to fight for our relationship and we both agree that living in Guetersloh for the past twelve months has in fact made us, in some sense, turn against each other.


All our issues interrelate with one another causing a domino effect.

And without friends and a social life, as a couple we have and are relying on each other for stimuli. Which is not necessarily good as there needs to be balance of a life outside of 'us'.

And at the moment, there isn't one.

But it's like eating cake.

If you eat too much, one is bound to get sick of it or at least have no craving for it anymore.

But he apologised for making me sad and that he knows he has to sort things out before anything gets better.

So anyway, the other week J contacted the regional manager of the company and asked if there was any other position in any other city, in particular Cologne. Cologne or as the Germans would call, Köln is not only more lively, cultural and more International but it's a city that perhaps could fill up that one aspect of our lives that is missing.

It's Js dream city to work in and chances of me finding a job that doesn't rely on me speaking German but English is much higher. It's about two hours drive from here and about half an hour away from Duesseldorf and only two hours to where my sister lives.

So last week J got a call from the regional manager to say there's a job opening for him. And it looks like there's a 90% chance that we'll moving by the end of the year. J just has to go meet the new boss and sign his contract but i'll know more on November 5th.

Keep your fingers crossed!

Which also means this will be my fourth move in Germany in the span of less than three years. Crazy, right!?

But back to us...

After discussing and basically laying everything out on the table, i made an ultimatum.

In the next two months, not only will i back off and not expect him to entertain me but simple matters like grocery shopping together during the week [which i found out he actually hates doing] will be one that i will take care of. Now that i have my bicycle riding under control, i just have to be more selective as to what i buy and what i can actually fit in my backpack and basket. Although with bulk purchases, i will need him to help since he's the one with the drivers' license.

And when it comes to the weekends, i'll be a little more independent and give him his space to unwind. Plus i will also give more suggestions to be more active and do things without relying on him to make all the decisions.

I will focus my energy on organising my things and packing up the apartment.

But then after speaking with my sister on the phone, she and her boyfriend have invited me to stay with them in Wiesbaden for the upcoming weekend. It's a four-hour train ride to where she lives but if it will help save our relationship, i'm all up for it.

Plus i get to see my baby niece and babble with her all day!

Perhaps me not being at home at his beck and call this coming weekend, may mean he may even miss me and appreciate all that i do for him at home.

And perhaps i will not be so dependent on him.

Basically, both J and i just need is a little time apart. It's not a time-out, we are still together. It's eight weeks to figure out our priorities, realise each others' worth and giving each other some time to breathe.

For once, i'm the one thinking positive.

So if by the end of two months, i don't see any changes in the way he's trying to deal with his stress and finding ways to save our relationship [and himself], then i have threatened to leave.

It's dramatic, i know but i'm hoping it won't get to that stage. It needed to be said to show him that i am serious.

So whether it is him doing sports or finding a healthy alternative, that is up to him to do and take charge. And that by making a conscious effort to cut down his game playing time, he can at least get a decent nights' rest and not get so worked up when his stats gets messed up due to a lost game. Or realise that now he is in a clan, doesn't mean his world evolves around it and those "friends" he shares strategies with.

He needs to deal with the negativity that work is dishing out at him and somehow turn that energy to something positive so he can get prepared for his new job and starting another chapter in another city.

The next two months is going to fly by and in that time not only do i have to get as much of work complete but the search for an apartment for us is going to be the real bitch. Not forgetting finding boxes and packing all our junk in it.

I HATE PACKING.

We're totally hiring a moving company this time to do the move for us.

Yummilicious Cupcakes

The night before my sleep was disrupted from yet another lost battle with a mosquito. And combined with an eczema flare up and some ongoing issues concerning our patchwork family and lack of communication, i woke up feeling completely unrested and super itchy.

And so during the day i just needed an excuse to get me away from my computer/work.

I had already done the dishes. Changed the sheets. The vacuuming. The laundry and ironed the shirts. What else was on my To Do list apart from work?

What about baking?

And so i wanted to make something relatively straightforward and turned to Joy of Baking.

The best part about this recipe was one did not need to blend the wet ingredients first and then alternate by adding the dry to the mix. Most recipes require the ingredients to be combined in stages as that tends to effect the results.

But with this simple recipe i could just put all the ingredients together at one go and then mix.

I did however make some minor adjustments but that didn't make much of a difference. The texture was still very light and continues to be moist even on the second day.

And when i peeled the paper away it came away easily. Meaning less cupcake wastage and more cupcake for me!

Yellow Cupcakes
Serves 12

Ingredients:

• 195 grams - white flour
• 200 160 grams - granulated white sugar
• 1 1/2 teaspoons - baking powder
• 1/4 teaspoon - salt
• 110 grams - unsalted butter margarine [ALSAN], room temperature
• 1 large medium egg, room temperature
• 2 large medium egg yolks, room temperature
• 7 ml [1 1/2 tubes] Dr Oetker Butter Vanilla Aroma
• 1/2 3/4 cup plain yogurt, room temperature
• Chocolate sprinkles.

Instructions:
Switch the oven on and preheat at 175˚C. Line a muffin tray with cupcake holders and put aside.

In a big bowl sieve the flour, sugar, baking powder, and salt. Then add the margarine, egg, egg yolks, vanilla aroma and yogurt.

Beat the wet and dry ingredients together at low/medium speed with a hand mixer until the batter is smooth and satiny. If the mixture doesn't combine well and looks too dry then add a little more yogurt to the mix.

Use a rubber spatula to make sure you get all the sides and any flour you missed.

Evenly fill the muffin cups with the batter and set the timer for 10 minutes, after which point the surface should look slightly cooked.

Pour some chocolate sprinkles on the top and continue baking. Reason being is that the sprinkles will remain at the top and not sink inside once the batter gets too hot.

Bake for another 12 minutes or until the surface is a golden brown and a toothpick inserted into a cupcake comes out clean.

Remove from oven and place on a wire rack to cool.

Guten Appetit!

MISSING: My lil' Christmas Bling.

Do you believe in signs? I do.

You know the kind that if something or a series of things happens, be it good or bad, it is a rough indication of how a certain something/day is going to turn out. OK, to be more specific, i seem to have lost misplaced my ring. Not just any ring but the "i love you" diamond ring J bought me nearly two Christmases ago.

Let me rewind a bit more.

You see, on Thursday, J and i went randomly to the Jewellers to look at wedding rings together.

Wait!

We're not getting married... well not just yet.

J's old fashion and plans to ask my parents if he can have my hand in marriage first. And from what he tells me, he hasn't asked yet.

So anyway, we were just curious to see how much those engagement/wedding rings would cost. You know, should J one day pop the big question. And after trying on a few, we eventually decided on a particular style that best suited my stumpy fingers and left feeling giddy.

We concluded that engagement rings in Germany are overpriced and our best bet is to go overseas to buy them. And before anyone asks, i didn't leave the ring at the Jewellers because i remember coming home with it.

So back to my Signs theory, i'm taking it as a bad omen that, a] we shouldn't get married anytime soon - not like we were planning to anyway. b] If i can't take care of a ring a fraction of an engagement rings' cost, how can i take care of one that i can't even afford? c] If you repeat things enough times, it WILL happen - like all those times i would say, "i really should remember to put away my ring before one day i lose it".

And yes, i've looked in all the places that i would have normally put it. And i've even looked in the most random of places like the fridge and in the cupboards.

I remember my ex and i were staying at a hotel and in a very intoxicated state woke up the next day looking desperately for some keys.

Turned out it was INSIDE the mini fridge.

-__-

I know, how random, right?

So i've checked out our fridge. It ain't there.

I looked there because on Friday we went out for drinks. Which now i'm thinking is probably more blog-worthy to read about and i even have photos but until i find that damn ring, i won't be able to regurgitate my wine induced thoughts just yet.

I've even gone as far as browsing through photos i took that night, hoping i could see a glimpse of the ring, just to confirm that i had it on that night and i did come home with it. But none of the shots show my hand with the ring in clear view.

It's moments like these i wished i had a wardrobe worth taking photos of, you know those blogs that dedicate a What I Wore Today section. There i could look back and see what i wore and then i would be one step closer to figuring where to locate the missing item.

But thanks to my good-as-Alzheimer's brain of mine, i can't for the love of all things Great and Beautiful can remember where i left my ring last. I know i wouldn't have taken it off when i was out on Friday, so where is it!?

I wish i had a Time Machine.

Yesterday i was so convinced that Luna ate it. Or hid it.

Cats don't eat metal but the way she was eyeballing me earlier, i couldn't be sure.

I even thought Yoshi may have tried to play ice hockey with it and shot it in the bathroom sink. So i asked J to help me dismantle the pipe but was greatly disappointed to find only a few strands of my hair entangled at the bottom.

It has to be in the apartment but where i don't know.

I'm going to recheck every pocket, unfold every clothing item AGAIN and even turn over every drawer because seriously, it couldn't have just walked right out of here. Mark my word, no rubbish bin will leave the front door without a full inspection!

AND

to make matters worse, i woke up last night... again in a coughing frenzy a.k.a i'm getting sick.

*Throws fist in the air*

My hunt continues...

Some Things Are Just Not In Our Control.

So my Monday started with a head-butt to my left eye - well not on purpose, i hope. An accidental head clash minutes before the alarm went off at 6:10am.

It didn't help that the person responsible was bitten, by what one could only describe as, the PMS bug.

He says it's stress.

It still baffles me that when some men get stressed, instead of talking about it, they bottle it inside. It's as though they're hoping that it'll just absorb right back in. If only, that could happen with that extra layer of fat that mysteriously appears around ones' waist.

Anyway, it started a few days ago and i guess the mood peaked on Saturday before we went out for his colleague's birthday party.

We were running late and according to him he gave his word that he would help out with the BBQ.

Fine.

Then we get a call from the birthday boy to say, he forgot his ATM card and he's already at the rugby game and he's about to play. And whether we could stop by the supermarket and buy some crates of beer, sausages, bread and sauces - basically the majority of the stuff.

OK fine, no worries.

So anyway, we end up spending longer than expected in the supermarket and J's stressing even more because there was no exact address given on the website and it's our first time there. J gets this surge of road rage as we catch every red light on the way. I swear if he was a character in a cartoon, he would be red in the face and steam would be shooting out of his ears.

As i glance over i'm thinking, i know we're late but i'd like to get to the place in one piece please. CALM THE FUCK DOWN.

We eventually get there an hour later than expected and his display of major irritation has got me in a fucked up mood. After that, i was thankful there was alcohol.

I find out later his main worry was that the game would be over and everyone would be waiting for us to bring the food and drinks.

Yes hello it's not our J's fucking birthday bash!

Why should he feel responsible to do everything? So yes, he offered to help out and yes he did a good deed. But in my head helping out means organising furniture, flipping a few sausages around when you pass the grill or change the CD when it gets too repetitive.

Like everything, J likes to be in control.

Maybe it's a male thing.

So after i told him he was being an arsehole, he kept saying i didn't understand.

I DO FUCKING UNDERSTAND.

I just don't understand why he had to be such a fucking arsehole!

...

So it's now Day 3 and there isn't much of a lift in spirits.

His words are kept to a bare minimum and whether it's coincidental that each time i enter a room that he's in, he moves to another.

I dunno.

All i know is i've got another deadline to meet, we've run out of non-junk food and the cats are down to their last can of food.

: End of rant :

Say 'No' to Snappy Service and Zebra.

So last year i went all out and bought the original Adobe Creative Suite 4 Design Standard because i figured since i was registering my own design company and working on a big project, i would do "the right" thing and get the legit program. I swear, that was the most expensive purchase i've ever made, it hurt me to see that money disappear from my bank account.

Everything was going well until yesterday.

I don't know what happened but Illustrator decided to have a hissy fit when i tried to open a new document. The whole program would crash. And then as if i didn't know a window pops up to tell me that an unexpected error has occurred. So then i try opening my working document - the multiple artboards file that i'm working on for a logo i'm doing and the same bloody thing happens!

At this point i'm slightly panicking because i've agreed to do a huge project.

So then i spend a good 10 hours fiddling around with the settings, removing preferences, clearing the caches and removing random fonts i've recently added. I even tried creating a new user account and nothing seemed to work.

For some reason i'm convinced it's a font problem - i blame my free font rampage i had the other day.

And end up reading practically every post relating to why CS4 quits unexpectantly and possible solutions. I then download a free program for MAC OS X called FontNuke which removes font caches - which i think didn't really do anything. And a utility program called Cocktail 4.4 which is a generally for maintenance and optimization - and again, i have no idea if it actually improved the situation.

I refused to cry at this point.

Keeping my composure and restraining myself from throwing something at my MacBook, J then tells me to pack my computer and we head to the Mac store in the city centre.

The guy at the store wasn't really able to help me out but offers to check the hard drive and all that jazz for 60 Euros.

60 Euros is a bit steep for someone who's going to just end up doing the same things that i did. I'm not keen on the idea of leaving my baby with him for 4 days and on top of that, there's no guarantee that he'll even fix it.

So instead i buy 1GB of RAM for 25 Euros and hope that will help with the lag i've been having and crossed my fingers, hoping to find the source of the problem.

I go to bed with an even bigger headache. Why does CS4 hate me!?

...

Then this morning i decide to uninstall CS4 Illustrator [only after having deactivated it and clicking the box to erase the serial number]. And then after reinstalling it, the bloody thing crashes at start up!

I'm thinking, Oh shit. I broke it. Sticky fingers, now look what you've done!


I read there was a font called Zebra that was responsible for programs to crash and what do you know, i found that sneaky little bastard tucked away nicely in my Font Book. I immediately deactivated and removed it.

I then decide to deactivate all 500+ fonts and like magic...

ILLUSTRATOR WORKS!

I swear i heard the gates of heaven flung open and sweet angels playing their harps. So i decide to painstakingly go through my font book and manually add each font back and validate each one. A real pain in the arse but i know it has to be done. And any font that crashes the program, i then can blame.


Turns out there was a corrupted font. The bastard font that is responsible for my misery for the last 24 hours is a free font called Snappy Service. I can't even remember when i downloaded it.

Hours of my life that i'll never get back and are gone forever!

So word of advice for anyone using CS4, should you have issues with the program crashing on you, i suggest checking your fonts and seeing if any are corrupted.

It ain't over... yet.

On Thursday morning we drove to Hannover again to do the finishing touches to the ungrateful person's apartment who shall be left unnamed. Of course that person was not contactable. In fact, he's nowhere to be found! How so fucking convenient. To be honest, we can't be bothered to waste anymore of our time trying to hunt him down.

I reckon if we did find him, it would have just ended up in an argument and added to the whole stress package.

We were better off doing it on our own even though a little help would have been much appreciated and would have saved us a shit load of time. Never mind.


So J organised a van to transport the 2nd-hand fridge all the way from our place to the apartment since J's Audi wasn't big enough. We needed one that was high enough to stand the fridge and the only car available at short notice was a 9-seater Mercedes van.


Yes, that's us before the stress of the day began, looking all fresh and eager to get the job done.


The van was massive and the fridge only took up the area where the boot was. There was heaps of space and tonnes of leg room. It felt like we were traveling in first class except we weren't going on a holiday. And neither was there any champagne or an endless supply of honey roasted peanuts.

Anyway...


We were just about to get onto the highway and the traffic radio tells us that there's a massive jam on the exact highway we want to go on, so J decides to drive inland and go around it. There's a strip in between Guetersloh and Bielefeld, which only days ago the trees were full of autumn coloured leaves. But the weather's been so crap lately that all the leaves have fallen.

Now they're just naked - signs of Winter temperatures approaching.


So after a 25 minute detour we get to the A2 highway and we're faced with a long line of trucks and random cars. Great another traffic jam! It's not even the weekend, why are there so many cars on the road? I blame the road works for this delay. Three lanes merging into two, sometimes even into one lane.


So we decide to go off the highway and cut through some other little town. Passing through more fields and hoping to get back onto the A2 somewhere.

An hour later we get to Hannonver and the locksmith guy calls to say he's already at the apartment and is waiting.

The balcony door is broken and we thought we'd get it fixed before we hand over the keys to the landlady. Half an hour later the guy dismantles the lock and tells us that he has to get back to the store to see if he can find a replacement.

Which is fine since we have to run some errands anyway.

He later tells us that the door is too old and can't be fixed. And goes on to say, the heavy wooden doors and locks must have been installed back during the Hitler days and they don't make those lock mechanisms anymore.

All we're thinking is oh fuck, the door's not fixed and there's still so much to be done to the place.

The paint job on the wood panel was streaky and desperately needed a second coat - the results of painting under very poor lighting. And there's no way we could hand over the apartment to the landlady at 5pm as promised.

It was 1.45pm already and we arranged to meet up with J's friend for lunch but were already half an hour late.


Why is it when you need to get somewhere fast, every traffic light has to go red? And why do people drive so damn slow!? Our day was getting more stressed by the minute. Hello bald patches! And as we stopped at each traffic light some kind of swear word would come flying out of J's mouth.

Seriously.

At that point we were so pissed off at everything, more so at the certain person who remains unnamed.


But then J manages to call the landlady and made up some story that he was on a business trip and wasn't able to be in Hannover as planned to hand over the apartment. So they arrange for Sunday at 2pm. Which should give us some breathing space to sort out all the things that need to be fixed.

And we're able to enjoy our spring rolls and Vegetarian tofu dishes in peace, without worrying that we need to be back at the apartment for a show and tell.

Time escapes us and before we know it, it's past 4pm. We head to OBI - a hardware store to buy ourselves a ladder and a brush so we can reach the dodgy paint job. Plus whatever items we need to beautify the place.

And 63.55 Euros later we're back into the car trying to find IKEA to buy 4 heavy curtains. J ended up throwing the old ones away cause they were in such bad condition. Plus it would have been better to just buy new ones.

The contract clearly states that curtains are part of the apartment, along with a 6 sets of cutlery and random dishes. Some have gone missing and needed to be replaced. We also included other kitchen items like a pot and a set of pans to at least make the kitchen look a little more impressive. And even added even a small carpet to the list for the main room, so that the legs of the glass table wouldn't scratch the newly laid laminat flooring.

We aren't taking any chances. Attention to detail is vital at this point.

We don't want any reason for the landlady to bitch at us if anything is missing, broken or scratched.


Oh and those gnome printed paper bags have nothing to do with this story, i just thought they were cute. I can't believe Christmas is next month! I can't even think straight let alone figure out what to buy for presents.


Oh and did you know IKEA bags are made in Vietnam? They're now available in a Medium size. I couldn't resist, i had to buy one for 1 Euro. Cute right!? Just the right size to go to the supermarket or to put your laundry in.

Germany is all about recycling.

Supermarkets strongly suggest customers to bring their own shopping bags to pack their goods. But if you don't have your own bag, you can buy a plastic bag for 10 cents. Isn't it funny, how those simple plastic bags - usually free at a supermarkets can be taken for granted.

Anyway, the IKEA bill came up to 133.37! Thank god we're getting reimbursed by the dad. It was already 7pm and it was pitch dark outside. The sun usually starts setting around 5pm now.

I suggested we take advantage of IKEA's bright car park lights and switch the direction that the fridge door opens there. The apartment doesn't have any electricity and trying to find a lost screw with only a battery-operated lantern can be a bitch.


Yes we came prepared with our bag of tools and necessary whatnots.


Yes, the block of flats have a lift. Can you imagine having to carry all that shit 4 flights of stairs? It would have been absolute hell. The lift was so small, i could barely fit. Beggars can't be choosers. Did i mention i was grateful that there was an elevator.


Here's J looking very pleased with himself that 1) the fridge was the correct size and fit exact, 2) he was able to switch the door and 3) was able to install it.


Trying to scrub off 4 years, if not more, worth of caked on fat and food bits off the stove top can be a bit challenging. But with a bit of Scheuermilch; a scrubbing milk used to clean the bathroom, it worked wonders.


We're not being paid for our effort spent cleaning the ungrateful person's apartment but i found a jar of coins he left behind which i fully intend to bring to the bank to get exchanged and keep! It ain't much but at least it's something.


You can't really see the dodgy paint job near the window but during the day it's really visible. It was already past midnight and we still had to make the hour and a half journey back home. I think the new IKEA carpet gave the place a homey touch.


Lucky for us there was no traffic and we were able to pretty much drive straight through and where there was no speed limit we cruised at 153km/hour.


The car rental place included 300 km into the rental price but with all the detours and pit stops we went over. Every km we went over costs 15 cents and so that's an added 6.30 Euro to my card.


By the time we returned the van and reached our front door it was 2:20am. We were so exhausted but so relieved to be finally home. J had to be up for work at 6am, which would only give him 3 hours of sleep.

I really feel sorry for him.


I, at least, managed to get 3 hours extra sleep after he left but was soon up to run some errands. Yes, i even braved the outside world and rode my bumble bee bicycle to save me some time. There's a little store up the road, one that doesn't require me to cross any traffic lights, just a few side roads.


I then spent about 3 hours altering and ironing the dark turquoise coloured curtains. And finished them just in time so J could take them with him in the car. It so happens that today J has to work in Hamburg for an all day event catering for 15,000 people.

Hamburg is about 3 hours away from where we live. So instead of driving at 6 in the morning this morning, he left last night. His plan was to drive to Hannover - where the apartment is and try and paint the walls, then drive back to where his grandmother lives which is half the distance of driving back home. But apparently the traffic was so bad last night, he was delayed by 2 hours and so he decided to just drive directly to the grandmother's place. That way he could at least get some 6 hours sleep.

J's event today runs until midnight, so we're hoping J's little brother was able to do the painting today.

Then tomorrow morning, J will drive back to Hannover which is less than an hour away from his grandmother's place, to do the finishing touches like hang the curtains, mop the kitchen and scrub down the oven. Then wait for the landlady to arrive to do the final inspection.

I've also given my camera to J so he can take photos of the place, proof that we've given the apartment back in a good state as well as a reminder of all our time spent and the hard work.

I'm keeping my fingers crossed that the paint is dry and that everything runs smoothly. But more importantly that the landlady takes back the apartment as it is and doesn't expect us to pay for anything more. We're supposed to be receiving a bill from her lawyers but it hasn't arrived yet.

Let's hope we're not in for another big surprise.