Sunday, December 19, 2010

Shifting Priorities.

RANDOM SUNDAY THOUGHTS:

So i have this friend whom i first met shortly before she announced her pregnancy. I'm calling her a "friend" because in my head more than a few conversations and laughs seem far more personal than "acquaintance".

We chit-chatted about life and did the obligatory 20 Questions & Answers to get a brief understanding of the other. This in turn influenced whether or not i thought we would get along.

We did. Well i think we did.

And in the close-to-three years that i've been living on this side of the world, i've learned how important Communication really is.

But apart from my sister and J, whom i can speak to about nearly anything and everything, there really isn't anybody else that i can run to should i need a shoulder to cry on.

Believe it or not, meeting people and feeling a deep connection with others is quite hard for me. Once again, i blame my nomad lifestyle.

So anyway, back to that "friend" of mine.

Earlier this year she had the baby and life for everyone including herself couldn't be any different. It's as if the world now evolves around her precious little being and that her "whole purpose in life was to have this child". I'm not exaggerating, that's what she said.

Her baby is cute, just as most babies are, but i doubt he's as "perfect" as she claims he is to be.

I believe, perfection is in the eye of the beholder.

OK so i don't have a child of my own... yet and probably won't understand the deep connection that a Mother & Child has for one another until i am a mother. But maybe some of my silent readers who are parents will agree with me when i say, i am insensitive or i simply just don't understand.

Just for the record, i have no issues knowing what her baby is up to.

In fact, i have no issues with her baby or with any babies for that matter. For instance, knowing more about my niece and how she's progressing in life makes me SO happy - i mean that in a non-sarcastic way by the way.

I love Mimi!

However, the difference is my sister and i can still have a "normal" conversation. One that doesn't include the mention of her offspring in every other sentence.

***

But then i think, it's no wonder there are many friendships out there that are suddenly put on a standstill.

We reach a point in our lives when our priorities shift. And the one common interest that once brought us together is no longer on the top of ones' agendas.

It's a fact of life, we all, eventually, move on.

And depending on the perspective, some move on faster than others.

4 comments:

Fallah said...

I'm a mum and don't think you're being mean or insensitive. I don't want to ONLY hear about your kids nor do I think you ONLY want to hear about mine. Sounds like your friend is so consumed thatnpossibly she's allowed herself to be lost. She'll one day snap out of it and hopefully before she loses all her friends. Next time you couldntry, " I'm so happy your baby is perfect amazing, pooping 4 times and day and its solid BUT I was wondering how YOU are doing?" if she still goes back to said wonder child I'd move on if o were you! Xxx

winkris said...

Thanks fallah la la lahh! =)

Well i dunno about her allowing herself to be lost but i know that her in-laws see her and their grandchild as possible Gods gifts to mankind.

I may be wrong but perhaps that has made an influence.

As for moving on, i already have.

e on e said...

people go thru certain phases and during the phase when u are not connecting, its time to put it on hold.. believe me eventually you will somehow reconnect when both of your phases are similar again. friendships come and go cause we are all growing at a different rate.

winkris said...

e on e : "Friendships come and go cause we are all growing at a different rate", how very true!

It's obvious we're no longer connecting, we no longer have a common interest in sight. And if my memory serves me right, i think she even once said she HATES cats.

*gasps*

Well i'm not losing any sleep over our "friendship" if that's what you're wondering.

*walks off and dangles a stray shoelace in front of Yoshi and Luna*

=)