Three Days Shy of Three Years Later.

So last night J and i were watching a movie called Nine Lives. A story about "nine short, loosely intertwined tales with nine different women at their cores. Their themes include parent-child relationships, fractured love, adultery, illness, and death"[source].

And although the cast is impressive and it had won a few awards, i can't say i was over-the-moon impressed by it.

With a tagline "Every life has a story. And every story has a life of its own", i think i was waiting for some amazing plot and life-changing ending. The intention was rather to capture the audience with intense emotions.

But what caught my attention was the second scene and probably the best scene out of the whole movie.

A pregnant Diana, played by Robin Wright-Penn, is in the supermarket and bumps into her former lover, Damian. And while both are now married, it is obvious that neither one of them have gotten over the other. But that doesn't stop her from telling him straight out he never opened up to her whilst they were together.

Uh oh. Recipe for disaster.

And whilst you can sense the chemistry sturring, i couldn't help but wonder what would happen if i ever bumped into my ex in the supermarket.

Although the chances of him being on this side of the world, let alone in this town that nobody i know knows how to pronounce, are slim to none, it makes me wonder how i would react. Would i dig up the past? Would he?

I reckon, i'd have a panic attack and hide in one of the aisles until he reached the check-out counter.

Some of you will know that when i'm sober i'm not confrontational.

And so i asked J whether he still has any feelings for his ex. After all, they do occasionally chat on Skype because of the kids.

He said, no.

There was no stutter. No hesitation.

I dunno how i'd be if i had to speak with my ex on a weekly basis. I guess J's circumstances are different.

And i have no idea were this sudden interest in ex-partners came about but it probably explains why i dreamt of my ex.

This is the very ex whom i was together with for eight years and who swore to me he wouldn't get married [or maybe he was just being polite and just didn't want to get married to me]. Only to then dump me because he fell in love with someone else and in turn i lost him as a bestfriend too.

I know. Tragic.

Then i had a nervous breakdown and forced myself to cut all contact with him in order to save my own sanity. Two years or so later, i finally have the guts to get back in contact with him, only to receive a sms that read...


And that's the last that i heard from him.

Isn't that crazy i even still have the SMS. Check the date. I found it in the inbox of my old Samsung. Talk about not being able to let go of ones' past!

Anyway, i pixelated her name because i thought that was the right thing for me to do. My blog entry that i wrote [here] and [here] are so subdued compared to how hysterically unstable i really was at the time.

And while it's been ages since i've had some kind of cosmic connection with him, i decided to test my feelings and google his and her names to have a look at their wedding photos.

I swear i'm not a stalker!

I just wanted to see if the photos would unleash the green-eyed monster and muster any kind of emotion. And three months shy of three years later, i can safely say i can look at them without wanting to tear my heart out or hers.

Yay me... and her.

So Mark if you're reading this, Things are even better now. How's married life?

And J if you're reading this, I love you and thank you for loving me back.