Spring has finally freed herself from Winters' frosty clasp and she brings with her an array of rainbow colours and a sense of direction. Trees that stood naked in front of my living room window are now sprouting several shapes in all shades of green, all thanks to the process of photosynthesis.
But nature does come at a price.
Allergy sufferers [J included] are plagued with a cocktail of goodies; watery eyes, itchiness, continuous sneezes and asthma. As the increase of blossoms spread like wildfire throughout Europe, we are reminded that the pollen count proves to be at its' highest in the morning. I have even read, if possible, one should try and limit outdoor activities especially on windy days to a bare minimum. And finally once you reach home, have a quick shower and chuck your clothes in the wash to get rid of any stray pollen.
But ever since J's allergy attack earlier this week, our desire to frolic outdoors has been reduced.
So whilst we wait for the pollen to settle, we'll keep the windows closed, arm ourselves with the 3-month supply of Anti-Histamin tablets we bought to fight allergies and let nature run her course.
In the meantime, all we can do is continue to... breathe.
And with no absolute relation to the above paragraphs, i sometimes catch myself reminiscing at various times of the day. At the start, i was like a kid in a candy store. Shy and mesmerized by the new textures, smells and sights. Eventually all i could muster was the stereotypical "long-haired Asian girl with a soft spoken voice that smiled nervously".
And even my updated facts about myself sounded foreign to my ears. Words forming sentences that only months before, i could only dream of saying.
And then i wonder about the Changes that come about when a person moves on with ones' life. What happens to those lost connections? Is it me? Or is it them that has changed? And then there is that dreaded alienated feeling. Those uncomfortable silences that find you scraping the barrel of 101-Questions in hope that something could break the awkwardness.
Then i imagine that i'm on an extended holiday and at any moment i'm about to snap out of this dream.
There i'll be, standing in the Departure lounge waiting for my seat number to be called out. Reason being was there was a mix up and the chapter that i am currently living in, is in fact, fated for some other person! [I swear it's like a full-scale soup opera all up in my head.] The closing scene is of me being deported from what i know as my "Present" time back into my "Past" re-living my relapses and nightmares.
[OK now, it's steered towards a very Back II the Future slash i don't know. And it's even more absurd seeing it all typed out.]
But then i ask myself, am i worthy of this new chance at life? I'd like to think so.
I'd also like think every person should be given that right. And no, this is not some kind of born-again religious outburst. I'm sure there are many people out there with a sad story to tell, perhaps some are worse than others. Immediately empathizing with those who have dragged themselves or pulled through the Depression Battle fields.
Personally, i think experience beats any medical written report or Therapist one-on-one session.
And lucky for you, it comes with this little piece of advice, "To Remember Take Take Each Day As It Comes". Simple but effective. Somehow it seemed to make complete sense when Shit-Hit-The-Fan one too many times and those times i'd be at my wits' ends with work, life and the stresses that came with them.
But nature does come at a price.
Allergy sufferers [J included] are plagued with a cocktail of goodies; watery eyes, itchiness, continuous sneezes and asthma. As the increase of blossoms spread like wildfire throughout Europe, we are reminded that the pollen count proves to be at its' highest in the morning. I have even read, if possible, one should try and limit outdoor activities especially on windy days to a bare minimum. And finally once you reach home, have a quick shower and chuck your clothes in the wash to get rid of any stray pollen.
But ever since J's allergy attack earlier this week, our desire to frolic outdoors has been reduced.
So whilst we wait for the pollen to settle, we'll keep the windows closed, arm ourselves with the 3-month supply of Anti-Histamin tablets we bought to fight allergies and let nature run her course.
In the meantime, all we can do is continue to... breathe.
And with no absolute relation to the above paragraphs, i sometimes catch myself reminiscing at various times of the day. At the start, i was like a kid in a candy store. Shy and mesmerized by the new textures, smells and sights. Eventually all i could muster was the stereotypical "long-haired Asian girl with a soft spoken voice that smiled nervously".
And even my updated facts about myself sounded foreign to my ears. Words forming sentences that only months before, i could only dream of saying.
- I live in Germany.
- I do have a boyfriend and
- Yes, we live together.
And then i wonder about the Changes that come about when a person moves on with ones' life. What happens to those lost connections? Is it me? Or is it them that has changed? And then there is that dreaded alienated feeling. Those uncomfortable silences that find you scraping the barrel of 101-Questions in hope that something could break the awkwardness.
Then i imagine that i'm on an extended holiday and at any moment i'm about to snap out of this dream.
There i'll be, standing in the Departure lounge waiting for my seat number to be called out. Reason being was there was a mix up and the chapter that i am currently living in, is in fact, fated for some other person! [I swear it's like a full-scale soup opera all up in my head.] The closing scene is of me being deported from what i know as my "Present" time back into my "Past" re-living my relapses and nightmares.
[OK now, it's steered towards a very Back II the Future slash i don't know. And it's even more absurd seeing it all typed out.]
But then i ask myself, am i worthy of this new chance at life? I'd like to think so.
I'd also like think every person should be given that right. And no, this is not some kind of born-again religious outburst. I'm sure there are many people out there with a sad story to tell, perhaps some are worse than others. Immediately empathizing with those who have dragged themselves or pulled through the Depression Battle fields.
Personally, i think experience beats any medical written report or Therapist one-on-one session.
And lucky for you, it comes with this little piece of advice, "To Remember Take Take Each Day As It Comes". Simple but effective. Somehow it seemed to make complete sense when Shit-Hit-The-Fan one too many times and those times i'd be at my wits' ends with work, life and the stresses that came with them.
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