As usual prior to going to bed i check whether i've switched on my alarms. They consist of two that are on my mobile and another two on my clock radio [bought during my university days in Melbourne to replace my very first dodgey looking clock i got when i was a young lass and had insisted it should be pink no less].
Each alarm goes off at half an hour intervals starting at 8.00am. Never mind that i don't actually get my arse out of bed until the last alarm. Realistically, it's usually when my internal body clock jerks me awake and i realise i've overslept. And much to the amusement of my cat who sees me sprint out of bed and race around and waits to watch me trip up on yet another loose wooden tile.
But with repetitive training, i have managed to hit the snooze button without realising it. At one point having to move my alarm clock further and further away, an evil plot to remove my temperature controlled body from my cocoon. But like the snooze training, i eventually learned how to step out of bed and return in as little steps as possible to a relatively cosy bed.
Since adopting a feline, i've been welcomed to a whole new world of wake up calls. It started with the morning fetch, as some of you would know his ability to retrieve a rolled up plastic bag once thrown. [If only he was strong enough to be able to drag his kitty litter out the door]. Hell, if he was able to do that, he might as well be trained to bring my shopping list to the supermarket and return with my goodies. But that's inching towards slavery innit? And i'm very sure SPCA wouldn't approve.
And recently Smooks has become a keen consumer of Friskies dry food. So i bought the 1.5kg bag that came with a free toy. [Don't we all love free schtuff?] A plastic rod with a elastic string attached to a bunch of fake fur to resemble a white mouse. And after wedging the stick between the sofa cushions so it's elevated off the ground, his time is spent tugging at this toy and rolling all over the place. Very amusing to watch.
Then some time during the early hours of the morning i'm woken up by a commotion. The next thing i know, i feel something hard pressing into my back. [Obvious that i fell asleep alone last night and there was no foreign body beside me, i was curious].
I open my eyes and i see Smooks has managed to drag the fake toy still attached to the yellow rod. And the second i pick it up, the devil's Spawn leaps out from out of nowhere and like a child being fed too much sugar begins to jump enthusiastically all over me.
My only solution is to hide it under the pillow amongst everything else he has chosen to deliver to me at various time slots during the night. I'm just grateful his vicious Satan spawn's attacks have calmed down since the scratches have healed and i no longer have to worry i look like a walking failed suicide attempt.
Each alarm goes off at half an hour intervals starting at 8.00am. Never mind that i don't actually get my arse out of bed until the last alarm. Realistically, it's usually when my internal body clock jerks me awake and i realise i've overslept. And much to the amusement of my cat who sees me sprint out of bed and race around and waits to watch me trip up on yet another loose wooden tile.
But with repetitive training, i have managed to hit the snooze button without realising it. At one point having to move my alarm clock further and further away, an evil plot to remove my temperature controlled body from my cocoon. But like the snooze training, i eventually learned how to step out of bed and return in as little steps as possible to a relatively cosy bed.
Since adopting a feline, i've been welcomed to a whole new world of wake up calls. It started with the morning fetch, as some of you would know his ability to retrieve a rolled up plastic bag once thrown. [If only he was strong enough to be able to drag his kitty litter out the door]. Hell, if he was able to do that, he might as well be trained to bring my shopping list to the supermarket and return with my goodies. But that's inching towards slavery innit? And i'm very sure SPCA wouldn't approve.
And recently Smooks has become a keen consumer of Friskies dry food. So i bought the 1.5kg bag that came with a free toy. [Don't we all love free schtuff?] A plastic rod with a elastic string attached to a bunch of fake fur to resemble a white mouse. And after wedging the stick between the sofa cushions so it's elevated off the ground, his time is spent tugging at this toy and rolling all over the place. Very amusing to watch.
Then some time during the early hours of the morning i'm woken up by a commotion. The next thing i know, i feel something hard pressing into my back. [Obvious that i fell asleep alone last night and there was no foreign body beside me, i was curious].
I open my eyes and i see Smooks has managed to drag the fake toy still attached to the yellow rod. And the second i pick it up, the devil's Spawn leaps out from out of nowhere and like a child being fed too much sugar begins to jump enthusiastically all over me.
My only solution is to hide it under the pillow amongst everything else he has chosen to deliver to me at various time slots during the night. I'm just grateful his vicious Satan spawn's attacks have calmed down since the scratches have healed and i no longer have to worry i look like a walking failed suicide attempt.
2 comments:
heeeey when is he getting the ol' SCHNIPSCHNIP?
lol I soo cracked up reading this post.
I'm thinking after the Chinese New Year holiday.
Figured it wouldn't be nice if he got it done before since i'll be seeing the folks and will have to put him into boarding.
I don't really want him to think his owner abandoned him cause he's missin his nuts... ahahha.
Uh oh.
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