Believe it or not, i actually woke up on time. Of course with the help of the devil's spawn inviting random plastic bags and half mutilated toys into the bed. Then finding it necessary to pounce on my chest because my earrings and labret caught his eye.
And as i walked down the driveway staying clear of the workers who are trimming down the trees, i listened to my iPod with the sun caressing the back of my singlet. And for the first time there was a cab that stopped outside the gate because he saw me walking down. What luck! And after thanking him and telling him my destination, a minute later he busts out with, "Good Morning". Totally unexpected as it's rare for any cab driver to say anything more than a grunt to me but definitely that little bit of courtesy was a great way start to my Monday or any day for that matter.
It's funny how just those little things in life can mean so much.
...
Seriously though, i can't believe it's already Monday! Why does it feel like Time has been given a line of speed? And although i'm no where near as busy as i used to be, say 6 months ago, i find myself one moment pulling clothes out of the cupboard deciding what to wear for work and then before i know it, i'm stripping them off leaving them lying in the middle of my room for my cat to pounce on.
Ever since being put on meds nearly 2 years ago, i've had to learn to accept that each time my day ends, i risk waking up to a whole new perspective on life. At one point it was like waking up to a nightmare and being in a constant battle with myself. It was a time when sleep was not my friend and as if each time i did manage to pass out, the clock would be reset the minute i'd wake up [which often would be 3 hours later].
Clearly, sleep is necessary to keep the body in tip top shape but more importantly, it's the deep sleep that we all crave. A moment when internal thoughts are quietened down and dreams are put on pause. It is those rare kinds of restful sleeps that i craved for and only lately am able to get.
I am still on the road to recovery and although i have days that knock me back a few steps, i know i'm no where near the gates of hell. Although there are some days i find myself loitering around with wire cutters, only to be catapolted back. I would like to think i have a better grasp on my mental takings now. I am more conscious about my surroundings and any personal decisions i make will affect my mental status at the end. The brain is a complex thing.
I wonder whether being admitted into an old people's home is much like the life i now prefer? Days on repeat, no quick movements, early to bed, scheduled eating times, time out to play with a 4 legged creature and consuming marked capsules. All that's missing is the bed pan and daily sponge baths by some fertile nurse.
And as i walked down the driveway staying clear of the workers who are trimming down the trees, i listened to my iPod with the sun caressing the back of my singlet. And for the first time there was a cab that stopped outside the gate because he saw me walking down. What luck! And after thanking him and telling him my destination, a minute later he busts out with, "Good Morning". Totally unexpected as it's rare for any cab driver to say anything more than a grunt to me but definitely that little bit of courtesy was a great way start to my Monday or any day for that matter.
It's funny how just those little things in life can mean so much.
...
Seriously though, i can't believe it's already Monday! Why does it feel like Time has been given a line of speed? And although i'm no where near as busy as i used to be, say 6 months ago, i find myself one moment pulling clothes out of the cupboard deciding what to wear for work and then before i know it, i'm stripping them off leaving them lying in the middle of my room for my cat to pounce on.
Ever since being put on meds nearly 2 years ago, i've had to learn to accept that each time my day ends, i risk waking up to a whole new perspective on life. At one point it was like waking up to a nightmare and being in a constant battle with myself. It was a time when sleep was not my friend and as if each time i did manage to pass out, the clock would be reset the minute i'd wake up [which often would be 3 hours later].
Clearly, sleep is necessary to keep the body in tip top shape but more importantly, it's the deep sleep that we all crave. A moment when internal thoughts are quietened down and dreams are put on pause. It is those rare kinds of restful sleeps that i craved for and only lately am able to get.
I am still on the road to recovery and although i have days that knock me back a few steps, i know i'm no where near the gates of hell. Although there are some days i find myself loitering around with wire cutters, only to be catapolted back. I would like to think i have a better grasp on my mental takings now. I am more conscious about my surroundings and any personal decisions i make will affect my mental status at the end. The brain is a complex thing.
I wonder whether being admitted into an old people's home is much like the life i now prefer? Days on repeat, no quick movements, early to bed, scheduled eating times, time out to play with a 4 legged creature and consuming marked capsules. All that's missing is the bed pan and daily sponge baths by some fertile nurse.
No comments:
Post a Comment