I have a friend who is currently trying very hard to get over her ex. And each day i see minor improvements as she attempts get over this one individual. But then there are days that she's down and i see how sad she is. It's hard to comfort someone especially when they have lost a significant other.
The guy is still alive. He just doesn't want anything to do with her. Or at least he wants her to get on with her life. I think deep down, she still cares for him. Maybe she even loves him and finds it hard to 'let go'. [A common scenario].
Which sort of reminds me of where i was at not too long ago. [OK i lied, i think it was 3 years ago... i think].
I lost my significant other... to an older woman. Which at the time felt and still does feel like a dagger to the heart. I think i've stabbed myself so many times, i think i've become numb. I think she's attractive and i can't help but notice that she has big tits but that's beside the point, i'm sure she's a very nice person.
But this country is so bloody small, we even have mutual friends. I've probably walked past her during my drunken days at Velvet without knowing [which is probably a good thing]. Believe it or not, the scene is so small, i've even got together with one of her male friends [i didn't know at the time].
If we ever crossed paths, there will be no cat fight or bitchy stares. Just a sense of envy and extreme sadness on my part. Perhaps even an awkward pause. Just knowing that she is partly responsible for wiping away a relationship that i helped build for so long. She flounced her way through and took it/him away from me. But then again, it takes 2 to tango.
One of many scary things about relationships. AND yes, it's the same bloody story that i keep repeating especially if you've read this from day 1. We were together for 8 years. YES EIGHT!
But you know what?
Until a certain someone else manages to break this heart wrenching spell i will continue to repeat it until the cows come home! Or even better, until some other comes by my way and tramples all over my heart and only then my story will change. And it doesn't help that my ego and confidence shrinks to the size of a shriveled peanut each time i think about it. It's moments like these why i like to drink, it's easier to forget.
But i am making an effort to slowly move on. I swear i am!
But as my dad once told me, "Never love a man more than he loves you. And never try and change a man." And how true is that.
My father ADORES my mother to bits. He still pulls her chair out when she's going to sit. He still lights her cigarette for her and when they walk side by side they always hold hands. They've been married for 37 years... i think. *i lost track of time*
It's actually quite sweet, it makes me slightly nauseous.
But i try not to get into an emo state for the sake that i've managed to stay stable on half my dosage. I'm trying to look at the more positive things in life even though at times i think it's not worth it.
CONCLUSION: I had a shit load of emotional baggage BUT miraculously i have reduced it to one overweight suitcase! But like i tell myself each day, stop looking into the future and take things day by day.
*whispers* Who knows, maybe i'll fall in love tomorrow and i'll fly away *shrugs*
The guy is still alive. He just doesn't want anything to do with her. Or at least he wants her to get on with her life. I think deep down, she still cares for him. Maybe she even loves him and finds it hard to 'let go'. [A common scenario].
Which sort of reminds me of where i was at not too long ago. [OK i lied, i think it was 3 years ago... i think].
I lost my significant other... to an older woman. Which at the time felt and still does feel like a dagger to the heart. I think i've stabbed myself so many times, i think i've become numb. I think she's attractive and i can't help but notice that she has big tits but that's beside the point, i'm sure she's a very nice person.
But this country is so bloody small, we even have mutual friends. I've probably walked past her during my drunken days at Velvet without knowing [which is probably a good thing]. Believe it or not, the scene is so small, i've even got together with one of her male friends [i didn't know at the time].
If we ever crossed paths, there will be no cat fight or bitchy stares. Just a sense of envy and extreme sadness on my part. Perhaps even an awkward pause. Just knowing that she is partly responsible for wiping away a relationship that i helped build for so long. She flounced her way through and took it/him away from me. But then again, it takes 2 to tango.
One of many scary things about relationships. AND yes, it's the same bloody story that i keep repeating especially if you've read this from day 1. We were together for 8 years. YES EIGHT!
But you know what?
Until a certain someone else manages to break this heart wrenching spell i will continue to repeat it until the cows come home! Or even better, until some other comes by my way and tramples all over my heart and only then my story will change. And it doesn't help that my ego and confidence shrinks to the size of a shriveled peanut each time i think about it. It's moments like these why i like to drink, it's easier to forget.
But i am making an effort to slowly move on. I swear i am!
But as my dad once told me, "Never love a man more than he loves you. And never try and change a man." And how true is that.
My father ADORES my mother to bits. He still pulls her chair out when she's going to sit. He still lights her cigarette for her and when they walk side by side they always hold hands. They've been married for 37 years... i think. *i lost track of time*
It's actually quite sweet, it makes me slightly nauseous.
But i try not to get into an emo state for the sake that i've managed to stay stable on half my dosage. I'm trying to look at the more positive things in life even though at times i think it's not worth it.
CONCLUSION: I had a shit load of emotional baggage BUT miraculously i have reduced it to one overweight suitcase! But like i tell myself each day, stop looking into the future and take things day by day.
*whispers* Who knows, maybe i'll fall in love tomorrow and i'll fly away *shrugs*
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