I had to runaway from KL this weekend. The thought of being at home lounging in front of the tv and having to tidy my place was not at all a reason for me to stay. Decided to go visit my folks and have some home cooked food. It had been 3 months since i was there and it was due time that i went down.
Spent a few hours rummaging through old photographs from 10 years ago and practically every photo album i browsed through had pictures of HIM and I. We looked so happy and so much younger. Memories are always bitter sweet. I came across a family photo of his, when we were in Melbourne and we celebrated his 21st birthday at Donovan's down on St. Kilda [he just recently turned 28].
I also come across photos of my uni mates and our many drunken loud house parties. And it occurred to me how much fun i actually did have despite HIM never accompanying me. [Although, it would have been nice if he was there to share my life. But he had his reasons, i guess].
But instead of throwing back the photos of him and i back in the box, i decided to keep them in the photo album and now they're in my rollaway bag. Sparking off great memories that only those present would be able to share. And one day when i have time and can be arsed, i'll scan a few and show you what i USED to look like back then.
In my dreams that i have of him and HER, that they are so very much in love. In my dream i am invisible in his eyes and i pass by like a stranger. And yes i know SHE will never have those 8 years that HIM and I had. And i can only guess they have the next 8 years to begin their collection of photos to look back upon.
And before digital cameras were the norm and having the option to delete on the spot to take the 'perfect shot'. I remember having to buy dozens of rolls of film to take snap shots that sometimes end up blurry or even NOT turning out perfect... but you know what? Those are the ones that make it so much more special.
Anyway, enough with frollicking down memory lane for now.
I told my folks that i'm going to adopt myself a cat and although my mom was a bit skeptical of me owning one. They both agree that i should. And i'm thinking that's what might be missing in my life right now. There's so much love i can give to Hardsequence and the BA boys but to know that someone, something can return LOVE is what i miss. Appreciation and unconditional love... is what i crave. And as much as i love MattEbony, there's so much this black beauty can show me without alerting me that she needs to be recharged.
Spent a few hours rummaging through old photographs from 10 years ago and practically every photo album i browsed through had pictures of HIM and I. We looked so happy and so much younger. Memories are always bitter sweet. I came across a family photo of his, when we were in Melbourne and we celebrated his 21st birthday at Donovan's down on St. Kilda [he just recently turned 28].
I also come across photos of my uni mates and our many drunken loud house parties. And it occurred to me how much fun i actually did have despite HIM never accompanying me. [Although, it would have been nice if he was there to share my life. But he had his reasons, i guess].
But instead of throwing back the photos of him and i back in the box, i decided to keep them in the photo album and now they're in my rollaway bag. Sparking off great memories that only those present would be able to share. And one day when i have time and can be arsed, i'll scan a few and show you what i USED to look like back then.
In my dreams that i have of him and HER, that they are so very much in love. In my dream i am invisible in his eyes and i pass by like a stranger. And yes i know SHE will never have those 8 years that HIM and I had. And i can only guess they have the next 8 years to begin their collection of photos to look back upon.
And before digital cameras were the norm and having the option to delete on the spot to take the 'perfect shot'. I remember having to buy dozens of rolls of film to take snap shots that sometimes end up blurry or even NOT turning out perfect... but you know what? Those are the ones that make it so much more special.
Anyway, enough with frollicking down memory lane for now.
I told my folks that i'm going to adopt myself a cat and although my mom was a bit skeptical of me owning one. They both agree that i should. And i'm thinking that's what might be missing in my life right now. There's so much love i can give to Hardsequence and the BA boys but to know that someone, something can return LOVE is what i miss. Appreciation and unconditional love... is what i crave. And as much as i love MattEbony, there's so much this black beauty can show me without alerting me that she needs to be recharged.
No comments:
Post a Comment